


The taint of Magic - A solas x Lavellan story

by Jessicakes1994



Series: Dragon Age World [2]
Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition, Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: Blight Cure, Cassandra is So Done, Cullen finds love, F/M, Fighting, Fluffy Feelings, Happy Ending, I'm Bad At Tagging, Love is the strongest magic, Naughty Solas, Not So Slow Build, Pan messes up, Shameless Smut, Solas Being Solas, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Varric's new novel, alternative ending, mature chapters maybe?, shameless fluff, unable to let go, world jumping
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-24
Updated: 2018-03-22
Packaged: 2018-08-24 10:04:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 38,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8368207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jessicakes1994/pseuds/Jessicakes1994
Summary: A woman pulled out of her fate and thrown into another, will Evelyn find her place with the ghosts of her past and future? Or will her new destiny destroy what is left of her already broken heart?





	1. Falling stars

My heart. Was that what Solas had called her once? Evelyn looked at the burning sky as she thought back on her entire life. The conclave, the breach, Redcliffe, Haven, Skyhold, Adamant and Haramshiral. How had it come to this? She felt so...numb. Maybe that was how it was supposed to end? The sky on fire, demons running amok, Skyhold being the last stand. Evelyn felt the pain then, in her head and side, burning her nerves as she lay in a kind of prelude to everything. Sounds were muffled as the fighting came to a standstill. The leader of the resistance, the lady of hope, Fen'harel's folly, what had the elves called her? The dalish, named her freedom. His agents, named her trouble. And yet he had not called her at all. In fade or reality, he was always so painfully silent. 

Why was the fighting stopping? Shouts and cries? Why? She realized then, it was her. She was down, possibly dying, and they would not let her. She had become an image only, she lost all rights to dying when she told Solas she loved him so completely and he had left her in that damned clearing. In another world, that was what he had said, in another world they could be together...She felt the cold creep up, the darkness stirring around her line of sight. Dying wasn't as glorious or even slightly diminishing as most thought it, she knew it was allot like going to sleep. Sleep. Yes, that would be wise now, as she lay in her hold and her forces protected her from Pride. So, Evelyn let sleep take her and she hoped it would keep her, she couldn't handle his burning gaze or deafening sorrow any longer. 

Evelyn dreamt about her life, all the years that lead up to this one horrific moment. The time before Thedas where she had nothing to fear of love or betrayal. Where things were simple. You see, Evelyn wasn't born in Thedas, although she should have been. There were many problems around her birth that even Solas couldn't have thought of it. Evelyn's mother was the first handmaiden to Mythal, the protector, and thus was highly regarded amongst the lesser folk. She had fallen pregnant with her husband during the last era of Arlathan and before anyone knew what was happening, she had been taken to a single chamber. Where Mythal sent all her handmaidens through a corrupted eluvian. Many worried that this would in turn corrupt them, they were so very wrong.

Instead, it took them to a universe outside their own. To a land called Skyrim, where dragons were myths and elves were equal to humans. This was the land of Evelyn's birth and this was the place she grew up in. Evelyn had grown into a fine warrior and even more skilled thief, and fought against evil where she could. With her mother's blessing of course.  
So when she became dragon-born on that cold winters evening, everything fell into place for her. She became stronger and defeated the only known evil in Skyrim at the time which was destined. Alduin. 

Evelyn had tried to carry on her life after that, not doing much, exploring and fighting and living as best she could. Love had been a mere story and life was so much harder. So when she found that same burrow her family had used so many years ago. It was hard not to delve deeper into it's halls. She could remember perfectly the glow on that mirror, the green shimmer that called to her on a deep level. And even though Evelyn had learnt not to touch strange objects unless she knew for sure what it was, there was nothing to stop her brushing her hand across that mirror and disappearing in a flash of white hot pain and fire.

When Evelyn had woken up, she wasn't in her world any more, but deep within the temple of sacred ashes. The conclave. It was here she learned all about Thedas, talking to elves and humans alike. They believed her to be a mage, a templar and even a sister of the chantry. Her elvhen ears did not deter others and she found a piece of her heart hidden in the lies and stories of this strange world. She learned more in that three hours then anyone could have expected a single person to learn. And when she had found the most holy, Divine Justinia, and stopped Corphyus from doing what he had planned. She knew that whatever brought her to this place, needed her like Skyrim once had.  
Had she expected to fall in love during her trails? Not at all. Had she believed in his words as they spent night and day by each other's side? Of course, and that had been her mistake. Had it hurt when he turned away and left? Unbelievably so. More than any wounds he could have possibly inflicted on her. But she didn't stop fighting, for what it was worth. Evelyn had decided to keep going, what was the point in falling apart? Then during the second Exalted March Council, where the world she saved turned on her, Evelyn had learned that time was not only the cruellest enemy but her greatest friend.


	2. The Battle of Skyhold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The battle for Skyhold begins and ends with Solas.

Time had little to do with her fate within Thedas, but it had gifted her small moments. Kisses in the fade, whispers in the library. Things that now haunted her dreams. During the year they were together, he had never touched her more than was needed, he would always escape before she could push for more. Excuses she now realized were lies to hold off attachment. He had needed time, he had needed to think before they became a thing, and she had willingly given it him. How was she to know their time was limited and Solas had never planned to stay? 

It was here, deep in the crossroads, when she saw him once more. He had turned a female Qunari into stone without muttering a spell of any kind, and that terrified her. Evelyn knew the truth was now far more dangerous then either thought. He knew not of her birthright nor her true skill and she knew not of his. They had loved each other from a lie and as she felt the pain of the anchor burn, she knew he felt it too. He had explained some details, silly notes on what had happened between them, he was the rebel god and she was a mere child in his presence. Did he think so little of her? A mere blink in his long life. And how had that hurt? Evelyn could feel the broken shards of what remained of her heart break even more. What they had was real. Had. Did he no longer see her as a reliable friend? A possible lover? Was he aiming to burn all emotional bridges with her so he could face his path alone....Evelyn wouldn't allow him to. Not now, not ever.

The mark flared and Evelyn knew he would realize that it wasn't killing her and that brought his attention back to who, or what, she really was. How long had she wanted to tell him? And how many times had she stopped herself? To tell him simply that she was already from another world and that she loved him none the less was almost as bad as facing the high dragon in the hissing wastes. She had gone too, in that moment of blinding pain. But her voice died in her throat and she merely accepted that they would never fix this.  
“You are no mere Elven though, are you Vhenan?” he had asked so clearly with each step closer, she had scrambled to move back and found herself fearing what would come of this confrontation. He did not stop and with each step he took, he brought himself closer to the truth more then she would have liked. What had she said in return?  
“We have both been keeping secrets.” she could remember that she had spoken with such sadness, the ache in her hand nothing compared to the one in her heart. 

“Indeed, though the question why you would hide at all, is more important.” he was stood in front of her, a mere breath away, and he still didn't let her touch him. How painful had her life been until that moment? How lonely was she really, he had shown her a world beyond her initial imagination and he had taken away so much more. The colours and sounds were dim and he had done that so easily. She could recall the look of hurt in his eyes as she reached for him, and the look of a broken heart as he retreated back through his eluvian without so much of a goodbye. She could still feel the sobs that wrecked her as she knew that this was only the beginning.

Evelyn had then told the council that the inquisition would remain for all those that still needed it, that she would not give back the castles she had won off the bandits and mages who had tortured so many more. However, her army would disperse. Part of it would go to protecting the new Divine, part would go to Fereldan to keep the king and queen safe. And a part would remain in Skyhold. Cullen had voted to stay too, for reasons she did not know. Leliana stayed too, with her spy network dispersing as well. Only a few loyal ones remained. Josephine remained as well, running her new family empire from her desk in Skyhold, others went back to their lives. Leaving only Iron bull, Cole, Sara and Evelyn as the inner circle. 

Evelyn remembered the days that followed the council, whispers of war and the old elven gods returning to claim their land and people back. Those rumors would only grow as more and more servants, alienages and dalish began to disappear from the world. Where they were going was anyone's guess, but, Evelyn knew that Solas was not to be forgotten. His plan was surely worse than anything Corphyus could ever think up. He had a way to return what was once lost, but the price? Was it worth it?  
Evelyn did not agree and she had spent her days running what was left of her forces and making sure Solas did not forget her so easily either. Had he expected an easy battle from her? For her to lie down and accept that the world wasn't hers to fight for anymore? She thought back to Skyrim, how it had not wanted to be saved but she had done so anyway. 

And when their two forces finally collided head first on the very grounds of Skyhold, Evelyn knew that this was either the beginning of the end or the end of the beginning. Either one was dangerous and no matter what became of it, she would fight like the dragon she was born to be. The dragon and a wolf, fighting over dominance of the world and neither knew if the other had thought this through...

The battle had been brutal, she could remember that, he had elves and spirits and help where as she had the most loyal of her people defending. Why he had wanted Skyhold and why he had not asked was a question Evelyn didn't want answering and as she took up her sword. She guessed that she probably never would. She couldn't remember what had finally got her in the end. Was it an arrow? A spirits poison? A sword blow? Or even magic? All the woman did know was that the sky looked pretty and the floor was cold.


	3. The Once Golden City

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe it is time to meet thy maker?

Which brings us to the current events that hold Thedas. Evelyn finally came too from what could only be called her fall, or did she not die and someone had healed her in time? Evelyn blinked as she realized that the area she lay in was no longer in Skyhold. Nor was she in the Skyrim burrow that this started in. This whole world jumping thing was starting to get tiresome. 

Evelyn sat up slowly and glanced around, the walls were a faded black and gold, a blending of the two colours that made her very skin crawl with worry and dread. Why was this place so familiar? The vielfire that hung on the walls showed off the once beautiful details, each picture still seemed to dance with shadows. Murals that depicted the events of things in Thedas. Evelyn walked passed them, running her hand over events that she could no longer remember, and she wondered if her inquisition was there somewhere. Was she displayed like these figure's were? Like the murals Solas had pained for her once?

“She wakes.” a very feminine voice called out to her, bringing Evelyn out of her trance and as she glanced back, Evelyn was startled as she saw two beautiful golden chairs by a large fireplace. Bookshelves all around the enclave and a women, what seemed a mix between elven and human, sat on one with a book balanced delicately on her lap. The Lady's eyes were swirling with colours that Evelyn didn't have names for, her hair flowed like starlight over the small shoulders. Whoever his was, they was simply breathtaking. Evelyn felt an odd sense of peace wash over her heart the longer she looked and her mind seemed to forget the pain coming from the mark.

“Who are you?” Evelyn asked, surprised at how well her voice sounded, and then frowned even more when the women smiled so brightly at her, like the answer was oh, so simple.  
“I have many names. Though, none are the ones you think. Humans name me Maker I think. And your elhven friends named me Forgotten once upon a time... Even in Tamriel, I have names that lay buried with the people who once prayed to me. But for now you can call me Pan.” she said and set her book down onto the table between the chairs. “Care for some tea?” she added and poured the two teacups anyway. The table was a beautiful red wood, the base seemed to be a wolf and the actual tabletop was made of glass that shimmered green and blue.

Evelyn stood still and noticed she was no longer in her armour, nor was she injured, or in pain but she could still feel his mark on her hand. Which seemed to hiss at the magical energy around them. Did it not like the company she was with? Or was she really dead and in the fade once more?   
“Where am I?” Evelyn asked as she approached the table slowly, worried she was never going to wake up from this.  
“I am afraid I can't say, I have been waiting for you for a long time Evelyn.” The Lady smiled again and sipped her tea slowly, “Andraste berates me often for waiting so long, but I believe I caused you less suffering by not interfering.” she added and looked at the girl before her. The contrast was nearly scary, a woman who oozed confidence and a girl who still rubbed her hand without thinking too much on it.

This woman who acted like a goddess, had chosen her, and somehow she was the real reason behind the state of the worlds?  
“So...you...you're female?” Evelyn felt at a loss, she had met wanna-be gods, real gods and she was even in love with one...yet to know that the Maker, or a spirit that thought itself the Maker, was real. Evelyn found it almost funny that the one being the Chantry believed in whole heartedly, was female. This earned a laugh from the being sat opposite. Whose skin seemed to shine like the sun as she laughed, she seemed to radiate peace and happiness and it was wasted on Evelyn.

Evelyn sat down slowly and felt reality bite at the edge of her mind, this caused her heart to ache and even with peace, she could only feel like crying in this kind of setting.  
“Yes, I do believe I am. Last time I checked anyway. But surely you are wondering why you are here?” she asked in reply. Like Evelyn should have focused more on that, then the gender of the goddess. Evelyn bowed her head and flexed her hand, feeling it ache again for the third time since waking up. Was it because she was thinking him? Missing him?

“I am sorry to say that I will be sending you back.” Pan said, now with a frown on her doll like features, “You have to stop Fen'Harel from tearing his beloved creation down. If he does so Evanuris will be free again and my creation, Thedas, will not survive the end of the year. And as much as my children believe I have forsaken them, I have yet to do so....but as you know, one must suffer before learning a lesson and even then, you don't always.” the woman said with a sigh, Evelyn found herself slightly angry that a goddess would remain so sure that some lessons could be learned at all. Her anger masking her confusion, what did she mean by creation? What had he made that he was considering taking down?

“However, I will not send you back defenseless, If you do this for me and stop the dread wolf in his tracks once more. Then, I will grant you the power to stop the blight. Even cure it from the Wardens and whatever else you might need of me.” she said and watched Evelyn for a reaction. Anything she wanted from her? Evelyn frowned at this, again with a choice. That screamed that either way would hold problems.

“You can do that...?” Evelyn murmured, then this being was stronger then anyone thought and that was nearly as terrifying as being stuck in the afterlife with her.  
“Of course, I could have given it to anyone before now, and Andraste has asked it of me many times. But, I did not believe in you and I did not believe that Thedas could be saved.” What kind of excuse was this? Evelyn held her hands tightly and felt the same anger she felt whenever a deadra demanded something off her. Like Mora, how he had demanded her servitude and she had been so brave and so angry.

“However, your sacrifice and ability to defeat Corphyus has proven me wrong once again. You have the tendency to show old beings that hope is stronger then doubt. I will never hear the end of it. Believe me.” Pan mused and looked at the elf warmly. How was this women a goddess at all? She seemed more human then any of them could ever possibly be. Her mistakes and her faults were so familiar and Evelyn found herself wishing for something easy for once. Even her death held problems and she didn't get to rest and have a respite. No, instead she was making deals and making choices that affected everyone.  
“So? Will you stop your Vhenan from destroying your new world?” Pan asked sadly, like she didn't have a choice either way. 

And in that moment, Evelyn realized, she really had no choice at all.


	4. Brighter future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Waking up in Skyhold.

Evelyn gasped air back into her lungs and flinched harshly. The burning sensation was nothing she had experienced before nor was she warned that coming back from the dead would be so god damn painful, though she should have expected something. Evelyn opened her eyes and sat up slowly. It felt like her entire body was on fire and maybe it had been? How would she know what they did with her body afterwards, or even how long she had been dead for. A pyre might have been the best choice, depending on how bad she looked. Evelyn glanced around, wait, why was she was in a crypt? Who would bury her like this?   
No one buried their dead like this anymore. She had delved into so many Elvhen...ah. Evelyn breathed out as the realization hit her like the air did. Solas. The air still burned her lungs as she breathed in slowly again, there were many things to consider now and as looked down at herself. Half expecting to see her damaged armour and wounds that had not yet healed. She found herself mildly surprised. 

Evelyn was wearing a lovely silver dress, that almost shimmered like melted glass if she moved, that was long enough to cover her legs. Evelyn also found she was wearing silver pumps and had silver details on her arms and legs. They swirled over her skin and she found herself tracing them softly. Someone had taken great care in laying her to rest and as she checked herself over, she found herself smiling sadly. Evelyn had never owned such a beautiful dress before and even with all the money the Inquisition had given her...she had no need of such things. Gently rubbing her eyes, she thought back to the grim situation that she was now thrown into, and how once again she had to rethink her whole plan of action. Evelyn couldn't even die normally, could she?

Everly recalled the sad smile Pan had given her as she agreed to attempt to cure the blight and save the world. AGAIN. The kiss on her forehead and the searing pain of being returned back into her mortal body came back soon after. Maybe it was just her fate to battle gods and stop the apocalypse? Maybe she should retire and own a home by the lake before all hell broke free? Evelyn sighed more and put her head in her hands.  
This was going to be harder then she thought. How could you explain that she met the Maker, who was female, and that she was sent back to stop the only god she loved and save the mankind from itself? This almost earned a hysterical laugh from her lips, she was so close to losing what little hold she had on her sanity.

Her legs felt wobbly and weak as she attempted to stand up, so this was what it was like to wake up dead? She would be sure to tell Varric, he could even write it in his new book. What an unsettling thought. How the Hero of Thedas returned from the grave...  
“What have you gotten yourself into now?” Evelyn muttered as she pushed on the door. Open. People must visit her often, or maybe only he did? After all, she seemed to be in Skyhold. And it almost seemed fitting, her resting place and his pain, under the same broken roof.

Evelyn walked up the stone steps slowly, her legs and joints complaining with each agonising movement. The elf kept looking around, trying to get her bearings within such familiar settings and when she realised where abouts in Skyhold she actually was, a sigh escaped her lips. Her tomb had been the old wine cellar or was it the old library? How long had they took to do that, or was he the only one behind it? She huffed slightly and came out into her main hall, was Skyhold even still hers?

A silence settled as people turned and saw her. Elves, humans and dwarves alike. So the people were still here and the sky wasn't completely broken just yet. That was good news at least.  
“Inquisitor?” a male voice, gruff and slightly disbelieving, one all too familiar. Evelyn could remember happiness and worry, and stories all at the same time,  
“Varric.” she smiled, her throat burning as she spoke, and turned on her heel. Evelyn felt her heart constrict as she came face to face with the ginger dwarf whom she still loved so much. Whom had loved her too.  
“How..? you were...” he started, looking so pale, like he was going to be sick. He was never good with this kind of thing. Believing required giving a piece of you up in return for nothing and, well, they had grown to stop risking that.

“Dead? Yes well, when has that ever stopped me.” she joked faintly, wincing as his eyes turned so sad, maybe her voice had given too much away.  
“It's good to see you.” He muttered, he had watched her come close to death so many times and he wasn't even there at the battle of Skyhold and she had died without him. Varric must have blamed himself or something similar along those lines. Did he believe that she was going to fade away? Like he was in a dream...did dwarves even dream?  
“Now Varric, don't start crying on me. I would prefer you to be singing!” she said and took the dwarf into a hug. Ignoring the pain in her side and even ignoring the sound he made when he sniffled faintly, when was the last time he even cried... 

“Gods, Sparky. Okay. I'm Okay.” he said and stepped back, trying to ignore the burning in his eyes, a feeling Evelyn knew all too well.  
“You should probably go see Chuckles anyway....he's in your room. Barely leaves anymore. No one has tried to stop him really...after the incident anyway.” He said and glanced back at the people. “Don't worry, I got this lot.” he added with a faint smile as he walked back to the groups of people. Starting to talk loudly about how their savior had returned and everyone now owed him money. Same old Varric. Evelyn nodded to herself and walked towards her room, the dress she wore reflected the light onto the walls as she walked. Maybe she did look like a ghost. 

She walked up the stairs slowly, her legs protesting even more as she reached the top of the tower. Evelyn really had to figure out a way to cut the steps out of this routine, not that she minded being out of breath and in pain that much, but who built that many steps and didn't think breathing would be a problem? Evelyn remembered how elves had magic like air when the place was built. They probably healed themselves or something, but it was really getting out of hand as she tackled the next flight of steps. Evelyn took a deep breath. How to explain that she was dead and alive at the same time? How to start talking to a man she had dreamt of for months? How to let him know she loved him still? Even after everything he had done to her?   
And how to tell a god that her birthright made her different? Evelyn shook her head and opened the door to her room, greeted only by the smell of spiced wine and smoke.


	5. What Dreams are made of

“I do not wish to be disturbed.” came a very irritated, and very sad, voice from above her. Evelyn bit back a laugh at how in charge he sounded, he never stopped being in charge, as she walked up the steps. Her feet weren't as silent as she would like, he could be though and she could remember how he had snuck up on her so many times for a kiss. She was a warrior now more then ever, after all, what did she need thief skills for?  
“What did I say?!” The voice snapped and there he was. Stood in front of the red flicking flames, a book in his hand and he was only wearing pants. The windows were closed and the entire room seemed to get so much warmer. Evelyn was shocked at what she saw on his face though, he looked like he hadn't slept at all, or rested in days. His once calm demeanour was shattered and scattered to the winds, like he was tired of holding a mask over his face. 

Had her death really scrambled and screwed him up so much? Or was it more than that, was it the fact she had died fighting against him? Fighting for a world that didn't deserve a second chance?  
He stood, emanating anger, facing the fire. Blaming the fire for something that was probably her fault. Evelyn wanted to run to him, but it was then she noticed her bloody and broken armour on display in his line of sight and two goblets on the table. One remaining untouched. What was he waiting for? The woman walked slowly to him, how easy it would be to push him against the wall and kiss him. Probably scare him half to death himself.

And it wasn't until he turned around to shout some more, that the anger and contempt almost vanished instantly, replaced by shock and...fear? Then he seemed so...defeated.  
“Haunting my dreams isn't enough, I take it?” he said so coldly, Evelyn did not say a word as she closed the distance between them.  
“Vhenan...” his voice pained and barely above a whisper. How had a god turned into something so pitiful? “I'm sorry...I am so sorry...when I...I found you...” he was so broken, by her. He was no longer the same man that had left her behind so long ago. Not the same God that had decimated the Qunari. Where was the rebel god that had walked away from her so easily?

Evelyn brushed his cheek softly, he almost seemed startled by her warm touch. His eyes closed and he gave a pained sound. Her touch meant so much to him, still.  
“Hush, Vhenan.” Evelyn replied finally, making him look at her once again with such fear, “Through all our trails, all our hardships, why doubt that I come here out of love, not revenge.” she said and gave him such a soft smile. She had wanted to be angry, to shout and scream at him until her already burning lungs gave out. But seeing him like this, watching the man who had once given her advice in her time of need, he who had made her fall in love with nature and adventure all over again, the man who had won her heart by his simple actions and stories, reduced to a shell of a being. Seeing him like this, so alone and desolate, made her heart break even more if that was even possible. 

He brought her into a crushing hug, Evelyn was taken back, he was never one for such things. But she knew that he believed her to be but a figment of his dreams, that she would soon disappear from his life. Evelyn frowned more as he hid into her, this man who had shown such cold actions towards her and started war against her, it was almost bitter-sweet as she rocked him gently in her arms. Solas was showing her his true self, something she had always wanted and even now, she felt like she shouldn't. How could she be the same after this? Always beaten and bruised, constantly lost and confused, but never as broken as he was right now.

After what seemed like forever, he slowed and quietened as she held on. Now it was her that worried he'd disappear again, behind his mask. He pulled back finally and looked at her, all of her, as if seeing her for the first time once more.   
“I am dreaming, I must be. You can't be here.” he said slowly, like if he said it aloud, that would make it true.  
“You are not dreaming, no. We are still in the waking world I believe. But then, you managed to trick me before.” Evelyn mused in reply, a joke, which wasn't the best idea.  
“Then I am finally crazy. You died, Vehnan. I carried you into your resting place, in this dress myself...” He said and kissed her head lightly as he ran his hand down her back, “as much as I wished otherwise” Solas added solemnly. He was so...forward. And it was a change in pace, a glimpse into what could have been.

“And why can't I? Wasn't it you that said the fade bleeds here?” Evelyn replied as he frowned and his brow furrowed. His pain turning to anger so quickly. It was almost comical.  
“Evelyn, you died. I buried you, in this keep. In this infernal prison that I made for myself. You can't cheat death. No one can.” He said simply, like she was a child once again. This earned a giggle from her, which only angered him more.


	6. Lost Feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some fluffity fluff, some shared kisses and a whole lot of tension!

Evelyn had found it amusing that he seemed so angry at himself and her, what had she done to incite this? Cheated death he had given her? So Evelyn kept just close enough, just to make sure he knew she was real.  
“But what if I had help?” she asked and held both of his hands in hers. Enjoying the feel of his skin against hers.  
“From whom? Hmm? You are in better condition then you have been these years past. No scars of any kind and I know you had many.” he kissed her hand that held his mark. The only real mark he had left on her body.  
“Mmm, I do have scars but not visible ones.” she said and moved her hands out of his grip. Why was she the one running away from his affection? Was it because his reaction was that of anger and shock. Evelyn looked at him, he was still barely clothed and it made her heart hope. Hope was so dangerous for her, it was almost as if affection was once again a danger to them both.  
“You should go tell everyone you are alive, first, your friends are all still here.” He said as he retreated back, retreating away from her now, into that infernal mask of his.

“Solas, I...” Evelyn started and was silenced when he raised his hand to stop her. Like her words were almost as deadly as a sword could be. What was he going to say now?  
“If you are back, alive even, then I have wronged you and that can't be forgiven, my heart. I allowed your death to happen in the first place.” he said simply. Withdrawing to a calm front he had once used on her before. When he had broken her heart into pieces and left her crying in that clearing. Even now, there was no sign of that broken man, he was simply too good at being indifferent.  
“Don't you dare...” Evelyn took a step forward, closer to the man she so desperately needed, trying so hard to fill the ever growing void between them. She had thought of nothing else really in these moments with him. They were still fighting, but not with their bodies. No, this was a battle of the heart and he was beating her like always.  
“Vehnan.” he replied simply, looking at her with cold empty eyes that made her heart scream out in pain. How could he do that? Just switch his heart off? 

Another step closer and he seemed to tense up, what was he even afraid of? She reached out and he seemed frozen as she brushed her hand over his cheek. His eyes closed again, agony on his features as he breathed out. Evelyn closed the gap between them, she could feel his heart beating fast and his feel his shallow breath against her lips.  
“You are willing to lose me again...?” she asked, looking at his eyes as they went wide, “Because I am not willing to lose you.” she added softly, whispering as she leaned in the last few centimeters to kiss him. He made no move to stop her as their lips touched finally. He made a soft pained sound as he let himself kiss her properly, and Evelyn felt what was left of her heart ache for more. Anything really.

The kiss itself brought all the burning and aching in her body to a stop, it brought that same feeling she had with Pan back in a soft and tender way. Evelyn could kiss him all day and she wanted too and as his hands brought her closer, he deepened the kiss. His control was broken as she put her arms around his neck and relaxed into his arms. They broke apart for air and looked at each other so softly, like if they dared move it would all come crashing down around them. A moment of rest in this reality.

Evelyn put her head down on his shoulder, sighing softly, she closed her eyes. Safe.  
“I love you, Vehnan.” he whispered and for the first time, Evelyn knew he was telling the truth. She smiled ever so slightly and nodded whilst in his arms. The old god sighed faintly and put one of his hands in hers. He looked so bewildered, like giving her physical touches was new and strange, or maybe it was because the only her she had for the time she was gone was in the fade. And then she smiled so sincerely at him, he seemed to give in to her, not another thought on the past. Evelyn closed the distance between them as she kissed him again. His lips were so soft and she could almost feel his heart beat through his chest, in rhythm with hers. 

How had it come to this? How had such a strong soul been weathered so much that it only took a kiss to bring it all back. They broke apart for air again, her breathing already uneven from the trauma and his...he was simply undone by her. Evelyn looked up at those eyes that still brought chills to her center. Solas seemed to scan her face for something, an answer perhaps?   
Evelyn tried to understand the unreadable emotion that passed across his features as his hand brushed her cheek. His delicate fingers brushed against her lips, like he was seeing her for the first time again and he was falling in love all over again. She lifted her hands slowly to stop him, her fingers lacing with his on her cheek, a blush slowly appearing over her features.


	7. Floor Show

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am not sorry...
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> ...Maybe I am?

Evelyn did not know what broke the tension, or why he retreated back towards his books, but something came between them that left her feeling colder and more alone then she ever had. She felt her hand drop as she finally heard the door shut below them. How did he hear that before she did? Ah, he was more aware of his surroundings...always on edge.  
“The plans you wanted, sir.” came a small female voice, Evelyn glanced back at the small pixie of an elf standing by the banister. She seemed to pale at the sight of the old inquisitor. “I-I'm sorry...I didn't think...” the girl bowed and left the papers on her desk before running out of the room so quickly that Evelyn didn't know if she had ever been there in the first place.

This seemed to bring her back to the pressing matters, to the dire situation she had to stop, and the being behind her life. Evelyn glanced up at the man who, even now, was a master at hiding behind a façade. The god of tricks? He had earned that title, and even now she wondered if anyone had made it past his walls. Evelyn sighed and walked passed him and opened her wardrobe. Untouched outfits greeted her and she smiled almost happily at the familiar pieces of cloth. Even her enchanted Nightingale armour was here.

“I kept them all.” Solas said softly and slipped a shirt on, another wall to protect his heart it seemed. “Though, the purple one, you have never worn it. And it is nothing I have seen before.” he added. A question within the words and she didn't miss it.  
“It is all I have left of before.” Evelyn said cryptically and smiled at his confused expression. “Before the conclave.” she expanded and took out the usual. Pale grey clothing that she had grown to like. 

It had been hard to give it up, to wear that dragon plate armour she was given. A gift from someone who liked her a bit too much. How she had folded it away and held it close to her. She had made sure to go back for it. The one thing that she asked from the Chargers. Evelyn looked at him as she placed the clothes on her bed. Should she change behind the shield or should she do something brash?

Evelyn didn't move her eyes off him as she slipped the sleeves of her shoulders. Watching his eyes widen and the tips of his ears turn a soft pink. Of course, she wasn't wearing much underneath. Whoever had changed her from the bloody armour didn't think she would need a breast band anymore, so the moment her dress hit the floor, she was very much bare in front of him. Heart and all. She leaned forwards and pulled her pants on, taking extra not to fall and not to lose herself in the moment. Carefully, and ever so slowly, she leaned against the bed to pick her tunic up. And as she did so, she could almost hear the intake of his breath, as he watched her put a display on. He had not moved, barely breathed, as he watched his inquisitor so carefully. If she hadn't taken her eyes off him, she would have been worried and shouldn't have enjoyed watching him be that speechless, or that he was simply trying to hold onto some of his basic control.

Soon enough she was dressed again and tied her hair back, looking like the woman he remembered from before Corphyus's fall. Had he missed her every day, every moment, like she had? The elf hoped so, but they had yet to talk on that. She had literally woken a few hours ago. Evelyn tucked a piece of her honey blonde hair behind her ear and watched him finally move away. Towards the books once again. This was how things always went about. She would push and he would pull away, making an excuse about his studies or something. And the saddest part was, the inquisitor wasn't even surprised. So many times...

Evelyn fixed her tunic once more, giving up on her little floor show, before picking the dress up and heading towards the wardrobe. The little elf froze as she reached the wardrobe and felt his arms come around her. Strong and protective, and still made her feel so precious to him. Evelyn held her breath as he helped her put the beautiful piece away. She could still feel his breath on the back of her neck, sending chills down the entirety of her spine. The smell of pine wood and him surrounded her, tingling her nerves and brushing her senses like he always did when he was so close. Evelyn felt so light headed as he led his warm hands down her arms, exploring the body he knew all too well. Solas had never been so brave before, and if he had it was only after she pushed too hard.

At least, he hadn't lately, not since the clearing nearly three years ago. The memory of him still burned what was left of her heart.   
“Solas...” Evelyn whispered, her heart beating so fast as he rested his hands on her waist.  
“Yes, Vehnan?” he whispered back, his mouth by the side of her face, it almost tickled as she felt the warmth spread across her skin. Solas was full of confidence and what she could only guess was mild amusement. What kind of game were they playing now? 

Evelyn closed her eyes, trying to bring what little words she had left together, as she shut the wardrobe. Feeling his body press up against hers so effortlessly, leaving a kiss on her shoulder, before releasing her once more. If she wasn't holding onto the furniture, in front of her, she would have surely not been able to stand at all.  
“Nothing...” Evelyn said softly, the pain flared in her heart as she turned to him once more. Solas was stood two steps away, so close yet so far, the arrogant smile on his face and coldness in his eyes made Evelyn want to cry all over again. He had so many personalities, it was hard to keep up with, but she tried. Oh god, did she try.

Out of them all, the main ones were the usual Solas. Where his control and intelligence was the mask most, if not all, people saw when they met him. Then there was her Solas, kind, caring, sweet and simply hers. Sometimes there was the embarrassed Solas, whose ears turned pink and he lost some control, when he got distracted by her. Her innocence or need to protect others had often left him so confused he had spoken the truth without even knowing. Finally, there was Fen'harel, the wolf. The proud and arrogant god that liked winning and hated losing. In any and all game. She had only met that one twice. And both times, she had barely escaped with her life.

This Solas in front of her seemed to be a mix of all of them. His cheeks and tips of his ears were still pink. His smile was full of confidence, because he knew what he had done to her, and his eyes still held the control that made her feel like she was talking to a mirror. After all, he could deflect and avoid questions like no tomorrow. All Evelyn could do was offer him a soft smile, one that seemingly caught him off guard. He watched her once again as she slipped shoes on, what had they planned to do again? 

“Let's go, then.” Evelyn said and breathed out as she went for the staircase. So many problems remained between them. She had died, and he had left. Both times she had no choice and both times she still turned to him. Was this what love was? To always look back, even if you knew, deep down that it would never work. Evelyn tried not to look at him as she thought on the sense of loss she still felt. What was she supposed to do?   
Her train of thought came to an abrupt stop as he took her arm harshly and pulled her to him. When his lips touched hers, her worry melted into surprise and then finally acceptance.

They had shared so many kisses. Sweet and soft ones for when they were alone. Deep and primal ones for when she had been gone too long without him. Small and sneaky ones for when they should have been listening to their friends and even the ones that still made her knees weak. This kiss he gave her now though, beat all others, his arms held her against him tightly. Like he was afraid, that if he let go, she'd be the one to leave. His lips moulded against hers and their bodies entwined once more. The need she felt, the ache and love, it was all too much. She felt her cheeks become wet as she let herself fall deeply into the kiss, it made everything that had happened, all they had been through, fade away. It was simply the two of them, and what jumbled mess of emotions were inside the two.

Evelyn sighed softly as he led his kisses to her cheek and put their foreheads together. He felt tense against her and she knew that he wanted to retreat once more. Her eyes looked up into his, and what she found there scared her more then him being cold. His eyes seemed to be aflame, passion and confusion were mixed with love and anger. He wanted her, she could feel that as he led his hands down and held onto her tighter, but something held him back, a frisson of fear maybe? Evelyn was going to ask him what was wrong, but she didn't have the chance as he leaned down and kissed her again.


	8. Night of Passion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I was going to wait, I had it all planned out, but Solas stole my Evelyn and well...  
> I AM SORRY. If you do not want to read the steamy smut (first time writing it...heh) just wait for the next chapter >.>  
> AGAIN. I AM SORRY.

It took Evelyn a few moments before she realized they had yet to move. Some part of her didn't want too, and why should she? She should let him kiss her again and again until she couldn't breathe, but as she closed her eyes in the feeling of his warmth and protection. She also felt his hand wipe her cheek, had she been crying? She could faintly remember feeling pain and love and such sorrow in her heart as he kissed her.  
"I hurt you, Vehnan." he said slowly, his voice so careful and quiet, she could barely hear him. “And for that, I will always be sorry.” he added and kissed her tears. Such a strong display of adoration, she was scared of this new side to him. Honest. Evelyn watched him as he kissed the other side as well. “I never intended to hurt you.” He was saying these things and part of her wished he had said it sooner. 

“Solas...” she gasped softly, wanting to cry again, but she held back the urdge as she leaned up and kissed his lips. Another soft, pained sound came from him as he deepened the kiss. Evelyn put her arms around him, pulling him into the trap that was emotions. He had no control now as his fingers dug into her hips, it was slipping and Evelyn wanted it too. They had never spent the night together, he had always escaped or used excuses to pass on intimacy. And at the time, she had loved it about him, now? It was a painful reminder that he never saw them together, like she had, and how he had planned it all. 

It only took a few steps back, a fall and more kisses to end up on the bed. His hands softly exploring her, like this was a dream he had countless times. Evelyn felt warm and cold at the same time, her heart crying for more where her head was telling her this was wrong. He had hurt her, caused her death, and in the end. She still bowed to him. Evelyn pushed herself against him more as he unclipped her tunic. Was he starting this, or was she? Evelyn was confused as to what they were doing, but she let the flow of emotion lead her into his lips once more. Her hands pulling him onto her, how brave of her and how easily led was he. 

The cold air was welcomed as Solas slowly took the tunic off, had this begun because of her floor show? She gasped slowly as he led small, hot kisses down her neck, she was once again powerless to his actions.   
“Vehnan.” Evelyn half cried and half moaned, arching herself into his kisses as he lead them lower still.  
“Yes...?” He asked, his voice deeper then normal and as the young elf looked down to him, she saw that smile again. He had done this eons ago with other females, he knew where to touch and where to kiss to make her ache for more.   
“What...?” Evelyn could barely think as he took her hands and put them above his heart, on his chest.   
“I am making a commitment, a promise if you will.” he said and leaned down slowly, and stopped just above her lips. “To you, my heart.” and with that line, she was lost once again to him. Evelyn kissed him hard, tugging at his shirt. She smiled when she heard his breathy chuckle, and even now she wanted to hear it again. “excited, are we?” he teased and let her pull his shirt off and sat back, as she ran her hands over his scars, marks and damaged skin. 

Solas didn't usually feel this open to someone, the last had been Mythal, hadn't it? And now he found himself content, as she smiled so lightly and eyes so focused on running her soft hands across his chest.  
“Always.” She said and looked up at his eyes, and he smiled more as he led kisses across her neck, blushing as she moaned again. Was he really planning on bedding her, when he knew she would probably still be in pain?  
“Say it again.” he asked, his voice almost desperate for clarity, as he kissed her breast, his hand kneading the other one.  
“A-Always.” She gasped and he smiled almost sadly as her head fell back against the bed, he wanted her relaxed, and he wanted to make sure she wasn't in pain. He would try not to cause her physical harm anymore. He knew, he couldn't promise that he wouldn't hurt her emotionally, he was broken after all.  
“Good, my heart.” He spoke softly as he kept his hands playing as he led kisses down her stomach. Her side was where the fatal wound had been, but now there was no mark at all. He kissed where his memory said she had been stabbed, and she didn't flinch at all, she was amidst the sensations he was giving her.   
It didn't take much work to undress the inquisitor, after all, he knew she wasn't wearing underwear. He had watched that part, helplessly, and now he kissed down her thigh. Her body shuddered under him, when had she been touched last...or had she ever been touched?   
He looked up at her as he kissed her womanhood, the audible gasp and moan spoke loudly to his own desire. He led kisses down, taking extra time with her folds and entrance, she was so needy that he nearly ignored all reason. She was pushing against him, looking for more than his kisses, and that made him chuckle once more.  
“Has desire taken you, my heart?” He asked, knowing talking was a distraction as he ran his hand down her body, looking at her pink ears and cheeks, her sparkling eyes and her sweet smile. Love had taken it's hold on him. 

“For you, it never let go.” She gasped and breathed out heavily, he was torturing her, wasn't he? Evelyn moaned again and closed her eyes tightly as he pushed his fingers deeper, she was so ready for him. Was she always like this after their kisses? He wondered what she did to release that tension and in that moment he wanted to see her do this to herself. But there was time for that, wasn't there?  
“You flatter me.” He said softly against her skin. Solas smirked when she moaned louder this time, she must have been wanting this for too long or maybe she had allowed herself to be swept away? Solas leaned up and kissed her lips, capturing the next moan as his finger carried on their way, slowly going in and coming back out, until she was shaking beneath him. Till her voice only held his name and her cheeks were red with the heat from her core. 

Solas only stopped when she cried out, coming around his fingers, he smiled and kissed her again slowly. He had expected that to be it, and he was going to let her get dressed. But she stopped him, pushing him onto his back and carefully climbing onto him, a bit clumsily but he smiled all the same.  
“Vehnan?” He asked, and she shushed him, he let her do what she liked. She shuffled down and undid his pants. So she wanted to keep playing? HE didn't know how he felt about that. But somehow she had caught his attention. He watched amused as she seemed taken back by his length, was she new to this? A frisson of worry spiked through him, if she was a virgin and he took her, he would ruin her completely. Wouldn't he?

Solas was going to ask if she was, when she took his all into her mouth, all self restrain disappeared as he felt a mix of happiness and unbelievable pleasure. When the moan left his lips, she seemed to take that as a spur, going slow and flicking her tongue and then going fast. Taking him all in her mouth again and again.  
“Fuck.” Solas hadn't thought he could feel this good, nor had he believed that she would do this for him. “Evelyn...” He groaned, he wouldn't come so soon. She would be too pleased with herself, but as she sucked harder he had little choice. “...Ah....” Solas was surprised, to say the least as the build of pleasure got too much to bare. It had been so long since...since this. Since he had a woman with him. He watched as she licked her lips and smiled triumphantly at him. Solas laughed and pulled her up, not caring where her mouth had been only a moment before as he kissed her, she put her arms around his neck and pulled him onto her. She wanted more?

Evelyn had taken great pride in making him come apart for her, and she wanted him to be with her. She couldn't remember the last man she had slept with. Some part of her tried to recall his name. Farkas? She pushed that thought back, he was a whole other world away.   
“Solas....” Evelyn started, stopping his kisses as she felt his hard length against her leg again. He was a god after all.  
“Lay with me.” She added, completely honest in her feelings, and she was surprised to see him consider it. His eyes scanning hers, looking for something she didn't know of. And she worried, for a moment, that he wouldn't.  
“With you, my heart, I would be honoured.” he said softly and kissed her lips softly. He felt her hands slowly running up and down his shaft, he wanted to moan again. But he didn't as he knelt above her, her small body beneath him. She was so ready and he didn't know what he was doing. He normally had so much control...

It had taken a moment, to get the courage to enter her, and it had made Evelyn smile more. He nearly lost all restraint again as he did, however. A moan from her lips nearly made him come all over again. She was so tight, warm and he groaned again. She made him happy. What an odd feeling for an old hurt god. Solas began to move, in tempo with her movements. They were no longer separate beings, but one, and he was doomed. Evelyn knew that he would listen to her now, he wouldn't risk her life again and he would wait until her second death to follow his plan through. Evelyn forgot all that as he pushed harder, deeper and faster. She was one with him and he was one with her, but the truth still evaded them. Didn't it? He had told her everything, and she had yet to tell him anything. 

Evelyn came hard, crying his name and he followed shortly after. Groaning hers. They laid like that, Together, one being as he held her against his bare chest. She hadn't bled, so that must have meant she had lain with a man before. But who? Solas found himself sadly disappointed and jealous? Silly thoughts, she was his now. And that was as it was always going to be. He smiled for the tenth time that hour, and closed his eyes. Letting the steady breathing and heart beat off her to calm him.


	9. Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solas becomes aware of what he has done (BAD SOLAS) and goes for a walk...unaware of the consequences.

They were cuddling, curled up in her bed sheets, Evelyn sleeping soundlessly and Solas....Solas was very much awake. Running his hand gently up and down her arm as he watched her breathe in and out. So many things clouded his mind as he watched her, his people wanted freedom and he had given it to them, but things were just about to change in Thedas and she had returned to him. To stop him? And she did just that, in the few short moments she had broke through and had him bend his knee to her. Her gentle touches had burned his skin at first, but now, now he was desperate for more. He kissed her shoulder faintly, careful not to wake the woman, and got up. He could recall the battle with almost pin point accuracy. 

He had watched from outside as the battle waged, the smoke and fire, the screams and yells of war, and he had wanted it to stop. This was his home once, and he had given it to Evelyn so willingly, for her inquisition. Had he only just asked for it, maybe she would have given it willingly, or maybe she would have denied him. Solas could feel his mark pull at him, and he stayed still in that spot seeing Cullen's forces actually hold his back. Another reason he was cautious about this, Cullen would defend his Vehnan with his last breath for reasons unknown, and it made Solas jealous that the man could do so. He had been thinking of her when there was a piecing yell over the sounds of clashing metal.  
"Hope is down!" it called and Solas felt saddened, another one lost to the battle. What he hadn't expected was his forces to cease or her forces to stop and turn. This Hope must have been important, but he didn't know who. Not until he saw Cullen's face.

The world had gone into slow motion then as he walked through the gates, his solider's stepping out of the way, and seeing her there on the ground. Cullen holding her head so carefully, a healer working hard. His mark flared and sparked. It was fading, why was it fading? He felt it then, the cord between them snap, and he had felt his heart go numb. Her armor was beautiful, what could only be dragon bone and Volcanic Aurum armor with details of dragons and...wolves? He was momentairly distracted as he walked to the pair. He scanned her form and saw the swords lain beside her. One, hers, matched her armor with the details. But the other was a simple blade he had given his men, and it was bloody. She had been stabbed from behind, into her side and through her armor. Solas could recall Cullen's reaction, anger and tears, he had loved his inquisitor. And now she lay dead at his hand. He recalled Lelianna holding Cullen back as Solas picked her up and carried her inside. Her body that once held warmth, safety and hope now lay cold against him. 

No tears. No emotions of any kind came from him. He set her down on her bed and heard voices below. Josephine was turning people away, and he wondered idly what they thought of him as he got some water and warmed it up. There was no need, but he did so anyway. And then he had taken apart her armor and cleaned her, slowly and delicately, like she was merely sleeping.  
Solas glanced back at her sleeping form now and slipped pants on. She would never know the magic he used to shift Skyhold into a resting place for her, or the magic he used to preserve her body and make that dress. He would never tell her how he visited her every morning and night because his dreams within the fade were always of her. He had known the spirits took her form, but he had let them try and heal his pain. It wasn't his fault, her death wasn't to be lain at his feet, nor had she chosen to leave him. So he should have been less messed up over it. But in a world with faded colours, sounds and lives without magic, she had brought passion and love. Solas remembered that she was not the usual elf and had secrets like the rest of them. 

He put a shirt on and walked downstairs, when he entered the main hall, everyone was celebrating. He watched Varric tell stories of how Evelyn had faced a high dragon almost single handly. He smiled faintly and walked passed, Dorian was toasting with the bull as usual and even Lelianna was happy with Josephine. What one person could do, he came to an abrupt stop as Cullen stepped in his way. Cullen's burning eyes and anger was met with quiet disdain from his side.  
"Yes, Commander?" Solas asked, the man was insufferable and seemed to have a high dislike for Solas.  
"Where is she?" He demanded, how confusing must it be to have a woman close to you but not want you, Solas wondered this as he narrowed his eyes slightly.  
"Why?" Solas asked, and the happy chatter almost died instantly as they realized what was happening.  
"I need to see her." Cullen replied sharply, he moved to go around him but Solas stopped that. So this human believed that Evelyn was his? Not Solas's heart? He could easily hurt him, make him beg or worse, but Evelyn would be unhappy with that.  
"She is sleeping. Leave her be." Solas said coldly, his eyes burning with untold magic. Cullen glared back and didn't seem to get the hint. He went to move again, but this time Varric stopped him. Much to Solas' surprise.  
"Curly, she's been through a lot. If she wanted anyone with her, she would have asked." The dwarf said and made Cullen go the other way for him. Solas looked at Varric slowly, like it was only a matter of time before the questions started.

"You see better, chuckles." Varric said and turned to the elf, it was almost sad really, and Solas wanted to be honest, but they were not alone like usual.  
"I am, Master Tetras." he replied, glancing at the spymaster before looking back, "Mainly due to recent events." He added, with a small sad smile.  
"It's good to see you out and about." Varric mused and motioned for him to follow, and so they both left the main hall together. Out into the courtyard that was still being rebuilt. Would she wake soon? Without him there. He hoped so, the idea of her missing him as much as he did, was pleasing and something about being there again was relaxing. But as they reached the stairway past the tavern, the sky seemed to crack and Solas frowned more as he looked at the green streaks.  
"That's not you, is it?" Varric asked and he knew something was wrong and it was nice to see Varric not afraid to speak his mind.  
"No. I do not know what that is." He said and walked slowly to the edge of the wall, the scarred sky was moving and it looked almost like it was cracking under a weight. "Whatever it is, it's not good, master dwarf." He said with a frown. It was true though. It was not good. 

Solas looked back at Skyhold and up to the balcony, just in time to see Evelyn spot him and wave. He smiled back and nodded, she had woken after all.  
"Do you think it is because she is back?" Varric asked, bringing the god out of his thoughts.  
"Perhaps, I do not know of a magic that can stop death or even rewind time. But it is her, that much I know." he said slowly and looked back at Varric. Little did they know, the same power that brought Evelyn back was also trying to stop the already damaged veil from collapsing completely. Time wasn't on their side after all.


	10. Mistakes of the Gods

Evelyn had woken slowly, alone, and it had almost seemed like a dream. Everything. Solas's touch and her death were merely a dream. The elf glanced around her room and her eyes stopped on her damaged armor. Not a dream then. She frowned, then smiled softly, she had lain with Solas finally, after how many long years of wishing for it...she grinned and fell back against the bedsheets, sighing happily, how had it felt? Being with the man she loved so completely? Evelyn breathed in and out before getting up and dressed, she took her time, after all who was waiting downstairs now?

Evelyn's life had been spent in odd periods really, she had grown up in Skyrim and it meant that she was unaware of Thedas' troubles or the fact her birthright was more then a mere accident. She was Dragonborn, blessed by the dragon goddess and marked by flames and trouble. She had fought for everything in her life and nothing was ever easy. That much was true. Even now, as she got dressed slowly, she knew that it was a moment before everything fell apart again. Before she lost everything once again. What had Lydia said? She was a magnet for trouble. Who else had accidentally fallen into a spiders nest? Or stumbled into a sleeping wyven nest? Evelyn sighed faintly and recalled the night before facing Corphyus and how she had wondered the same thing she did here. Did that mean she was going to face something soon?

It was a crack of thunder that roused her from her room and out onto the balcony, she frowned at the flashes of lightning and rumbles of thunder. Yet there were no clouds. She looked down, there he was looking at her, and she giggled faintly. Waving. He was her heart, and she was his. What a nice thought. It all came crumbling down though, in that small moment, the sky seemed to shatter and Evelyn froze in her spot. How could something as real as the air above them seem to crumble like nothing? Had Pan misjudged the time she had? It was terrible as she saw magic ripple like a shockwave above her, no demons though and that gave her pause. Evelyn glanced down to Solas, who was looking at her with worry and fear, why was he looking at her like that? It hit her like a slap, he wasn't doing this and neither was she, which meant that someone else was. Or maybe the years of cracks were finally unable to stand anymore. Whatever it was, she felt the tug in her heart and glanced back for a moment. What was she supposed to do? Evelyn gave an eep and braced herself against the banister as the ground beneath her feet rumbled and started to shake, more cracks appearing everywhere she could see. The mountains crumbled and the tower she was in started to give way. Screams and shouts came from beneath her, the courtyard seemed a wash of activity and she looked up at the sky in time to see a blinding flash of green light.

It had been too bright, and Evelyn had to cover her eyes to stop herself being blinded.  
"Find the truth, and save Thedas..." came a whisper from behind her, Evelyn turned to see but was pushed forward, getting her head knocked off the stone balcony floor. It was over like that, no more thoughts.

When Evelyn came too, she was freezing and it was not the nice kind of cold either. Her eyes opened slowly and she felt dread spread in her gut, this wasn't Skyhold....no, she wasn't in Thedas anymore.  
"Solas..." she gasped and pushed herself up, still wearing the outfit from skyhold though and that meant she had no weapons. "Shit." she glanced around the room, the broken mirror was pulsing slightly, the cracks in it were larger now too. She noticed her backpack and breathed out in relief. Her spare armor and weapons from her time in Skyrim were waiting.  
"Sparky?" came a male voice and Evelyn spun, coming face to face with a Nord who looked too much like Varric.  
"Varric?" she asked in confusement, and the nord seemed to nod and look down at himself.  
"I am tall." he said slowly and looked around the room, "Where are we? What happened?" he added and walked to her, he was wearing fur armor and had his crossbow on his back. Seemed that didn't change much after all. Evelyn watched him pick up a torch and she was taken back for a moment, he was still good looking but if he was there...did that mean Solas was too? 

Evelyn brushed her clothes and frowned slightly, he would have to know the truth now too, and who else? Everyone? Evelyn wasn't ready for that, but it couldn't be stopped if they were in Skyrim now.  
"We are in Skyrim, my home country, I am not sure what happened but it must have been Pan, or the Maker, and we have to find the others..." she breathed out and watched the man before her take that all in.  
"You...came from here....?" he asked slowly, "Okay...so why am I no longer a dwarf?" he asked and picked her bag up and blinked at the weight of it.  
"There....are no dwarfs in Skyrim, they are extint. Have been for years." she winced as his eyes narrowed, "So the god that put us here must have changed you....oh gods, Bull. There are no qunari either!" Evelyn rubbed her head and took the bag, "Come on, Nord, lets find some food." she teased and laughed lightly at his huff. "So, when you asked about those stories...you really had never heard of them before?" Varric asked as they walked down the side of a mountain, Evelyn gave him a sheepish smile and laughed as he rolled his eyes. "All this time, Sparky, and you still surprise me." he added with a bemused smile. How little he knew her, Evelyn smiled sadly as they reached the main path. Hopefully everyone was okay.

They were in trouble now, weren't they? Evelyn wondered what happened, how had the sky fallen apart like that. There must have been a reason why Pan sent them here...maybe there was something in Skyrim where they could fix Thedas. Evelyn rubbed her eyes as they left the burrow. They were two days walk from Whiterun, so they would need to find food themselves. At least she had a bow to hunt with. Varric seemed to be taking the world jumping quite well, but he kept looking at her with suspicion and she knew it was because of the story she had yet to tell. Varric always knew when there was a story involved...her mother could tell it better, and somehow she wondered how her mother would take Varric. Evelyn knew that her mother missed Thedas, but she didn't miss the old gods (including Solas) or wars. How long had she been gone from this world? Not long by the looks of it...


	11. The truth of dragonblood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ready for the wolf to meet the dragon?

It had been a nice trek, Varric was getting used to his new height and extra strength, though Bianca seemed relatively the same. Evelyn had hunted for their dinner and supper most nights and it was nice to tell someone finally the truth on her skill. Varric seemed unsure at first with her dovah language and he jokingly said she was too good with other languages for it to be a fluke. Though the stories she told made him pale and look at her differently, she did not mind at all, he knew now and that was all that mattered. 

Evelyn wondered though, for a moment or two, what Solas would say to this. Surely he was in Skyrim too, but why had Varric woke up with her? Not with the elf god? She huffed faintly and looked at dragonsreach before them.

"So this is your home huh?" Varric asked as they walked through the gates,   
"Mhmm, mum should be around here somewhere." she replied and bowed her head to the guard who seemed too happy with her.  
"Your a god damn hero here too?" Varric laughed and looked around the street. "Is there anywhere your not a hero?" he asked jokingly. Evelyn winced at this though, she was no one's hero, just luck had placed her in the head of each story. She was looking ahead, waiting to see her mother stood on the doorstep as usual when she felt ice creep up her back. There on the steps was her mother, who seemed too happy with the male elf stood near her.

"It is good to see some of the lords survived." the voice of her mother carried and that ice soon turned to relief as the male elf turned and familiar blue eyes met with her green.

"Solas." she breathed and the elf seemed to offer a small smile, a smile that didn't reach his eyes.  
"Evelyn? Evelyn!" her mother cired and ran to her, hugging her tightly, though Evelyn's eyes never left Solas. His smile faded completely and his eyes were so cold that she wondered for a moment what she had done...ah yes, lied about who she was.

She had not known Solas was Fen'Harel when they met, if she had...would she still offered herself so freely? She smiled at her mother and ushered her into the house, Varric following and striking a conversation up freely with the elder elf. Leaving Solas and Evelyn looking at each other on the street.

"No more secrets, Ma Vehnan." he said simply, watching her every move now like she was the god and he was the mere elf.  
"I was worried, Solas, what happened? Why are we here?" Evelyn tried to stem the tide of questions but she blinked as she reached out to him and he stopped her. Rejection swam through her heart again, was he pushing her away?  
"First, Evelyn, tell me who you are." he said harshly, causing the younger elf to flinch slightly. He was pushing himself away, in order to protect himself?  
"Solas, I-"  
"No. The truth." he snapped and Evelyn took a step back, he had never been so cold towards her and even now, she tried to recall how he looked when he lost her. Did he go through that again? He was being so calculated and stern, something must have happened.

"I am from here. Born and raised, I only came to Thedas a few days before the breach." she started slowly, watching his eyes cloud in anger, "then I was thrown into the inquisition and you..." she stopped as she watched him glare at her so easily. "I wanted to tell you, so many times, but -" she frowned as he raised his hand to stop her.

"You are no mere elf, Evelyn, your mother tells me you are Dragonborn, I did not know that term but I do now after days of studying your collection. You have the soul of a dragon." he glared at her so fiercely, "Chosen by Mythal to protect the people. The reason Arlathan failed? It's Keeper was gone, there was no second to take his place. You were here when you should have been there!" he shouted and she flinched again. "The people needed you and Mythal sends you here?!" he snapped and began pacing. Evelyn felt a loss as she watched him lose his control in a different way.

"I woke up to dull and pain and our people suffering and I blamed myself. But no. It was YOUR FAULT." he hissed and Evelyn felt the words hit her heart so perfectly, "I planned to change it, to make it right and then you...y-you fell into my life and changed the rules!" he snapped and glared some more. Solas had never been so open and now, she didn't know what to do. So she took it. Every word he threw at her in anger, the disgust in his eyes that burned away at her hope. She had spent days worrying over him and he had spent the same time hating her.

"You brought colour and life and love and I believed for a stupid moment that you were mortal and just a breath of what was. Then I had to leave. I believed I was doing you the best I could!" Evelyn froze as she listened to his ranting, he was so caught up in his anger he no longer realized what he said. "Then you DIED! I HELD YOU!" He snapped again, the people around had stopped to see the male elf shout at the dragonborn. "But no! You returned to me, and I was so Happy...." he stopped and looked at her in utter agony that tore what was left in her heart to shreds. "...then I woke up." He said simply, and that was it. He was looking at her with cold precision once more. "So yes, I know all about your adventures here in Skyrim, your mother, who I know quite well due to her being Mythal's handmaiden by the way." he hissed and stepped closer, Evelyn was frozen to the spot, afraid that if she moved she'd crumble.

"I believed that you loved me, Evelyn, but now I am not sure." Solas said simply and that made her snap to attention,  
"Ar lath ma, Venhan." she said softly, her voice breaking and she tried to hide the pain she felt, but he just scoffed and pushed passed her. Leaving her stood on the doorstep to her home. Evelyn blinked at where he had stood and felt the same piecing sorrow hit her again in waves. He had left? Evelyn turned to where he walked off and saw the gates shut. He had left her. All those moments she couldn't sleep, barely ate, too worried to do much and he had just left. 

"Sparky?" came a small male voice, Evelyn turned to the open door. Where Varric was stood with that same worried expression he had wore the last time Solas left her. Her mother seemed worried too, biting her lip like she always did.  
"He left." was all she could say before Varric frowned more and pulled her into a hug. 

"I know." was his simple reply.


	12. Long Road Ahead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evelyn can't tell what is making her so on edge, Solas still hasn't returned and Varric is settling in too well into his new role in Whiterun. What is that inkling that something is horribly wrong with the world...? What has she missed?

Day one of no Solas, and it passed slowly. Evelyn stood in the back end of Jorrvaskr watching the others, a sense of home warmed her but she didn't allow it to settle. Varric was telling stories of her, all listened with such vigor she had to remember Varric's power with words. Her mind went back to her love, why had he been so angry? What had he expected from her? A fight perhaps? She sighed faintly and looked back at the people who surrounded her. 

Day two of no Solas passed the same, stories and ale and lack of feeling. All she wanted to do was go out and find him, but Skyrim was a big place and she had no idea where he went nor if he even knew where to go. What if bandits got him? Or those damn spiders? Evelyn breathed in the cold misty air and felt a shiver run down her spine. She had found that she hadn't been gone at all. For some reason time passed differently in Skyrim to Thedas and she worried what that meant for the others. 

Day three of no Solas was met with more shivers, they were coming more often and she flexed her hand each time. The only time she caught it was when she was sat, watching Varric tell the story of how she fell out of a realm of spirits. Oohs and ahhs surrounded her as she watched the mark on her hand glow and flicker. She frowned and watched it, there was no way that his mark could work here as there was no veil for it to work on. It calmed and dulled after a moment, and that was when she felt the shiver, this wasn't natural and it was making her jumpy.

Day four of no Solas was even worse, Evelyn was pacing by the skyforge as Eourlaud told her of the things that had happened. She was itching for something. Anything. What was wrong with her?  
"And we have seen an increase of these weird creatures..." That caught her attention, she spun to face him and watched as he smiled faintly, he knew she wasn't listening.

"Sorry, go on, creatures?" Evelyn said with a slight smile, he chuckled at this and stopped working on the sword.

"Farkas came back one night, said it raised up like the dust and attacked without warning, no deaths but the wounds were unlike any I have seen." he said and brushed his hands on the apron, "Then welps started coming back with burns or frostbite, some with claws marks that festered. Only the magic from Winterhold can heal them." he said and looked at the Harbinger. Demons.

"How long, Eourlaud, how long ahs this been happening?" she asked and took his arms, the mark sparked as she did so and the man stopped for a moment.

"The last few weeks...what does-" she was already half way down the steps, running too fast for him to keep up with.

Day five of no Solas, and Evelyn had a plan. A bad plan as Varric said, but a plan all the same. Her mother though, was smiling so sweetly. Evelyn was packing her pack when the older elf stopped her and sat down beside her daughter.

"There is something I have to tell you, my dear." She started and Evelyn felt dread twist in her stomach, but the dragonborn stopped and sat cross legged before her mother. "I should tell you of your father, a very important man to everyone." she started and Evelyn frowned more, she had always thought her farther died in Skyrim. 

"He was a knight of Mythal, the commander and leader of her guards. He was our goddess's favourite and many named him a child of a dragon with his fierce protection and desire to fight. When I found I was with child, with you, he was so happy." she said and brushed her daughters hair slowly. "He had such big plans for you, but then...they attacked." Evelyn held her breath as her mother explained that an argument between the gods led them to fight and they found that gods or namely, goddesses, could die.

"Before she died, she told us to use the broken Eluvian. But we could only send three or four, your father stayed behind...made me promise you would never return to Thedas. Arlathan would fall. But that was the way the world had to be." she said as she put braids in Evelyn's hair. "I knew all the gods and goddesses, as Handmaiden, but your Fen'Harel...he wasn't at all like I remembered." she said and looked at her. "He didn't even recognize me at first, which I thought was very odd as I helped him with the uprising." she said with a shake of her head. Evelyn frowned more at this, that was the second time someone had said something like that to her...who was the first?

"Thank you mama, I have to do this now more then ever." she said and kissed her mothers hands before standing, "Maybe I can find out why he was so angry..." she said softly. Her mother simply smiled more and stood too.

"My little dragon, be safe." Evelyn merely nodded and hugged the elder before leaving Breezehome and heading for the gates.

Day six of no Solas and being alone once more, Varric staying behind to protect her mother, it was oddly peaceful and relaxing. No one forcing her to bow to nobles, or fight monsters, fix broken kingdoms or skies and no one giving her that look. But her heart wept and she knew the only way to fix that was to find her wolf and that was going to be a fight in itself. The road was long and she had plenty of time...didn't she?

Day seven of no Solas was long, walking towards Riften. A whole week since he left again but she wasn't so...broken by it. Which was very odd. Surely if it had been true then she would feel like she had once before, but no, she felt determined. Evelyn was lay on her bedroll rubbing her hand and staring at the sky. The sun was setting and she was about half way. The mark kept sparking and she could start to feel it again. Evelyn closed her eyes and breathed in, a whole week of no dreams, was she glad of that?

This night would be different. She woke in what looked like the golden city she had been in with Pan and she stopped as she saw a scene play in front of her. Was that...Solas? She pushed herself up and tried to get closer, it was! She stopped as she watched him talk to a woman. He looked sad. Why did he look sad? She couldn't hear what they were saying but it looked weird, she blinked as the mark sparked and flared, causing pain to flare in her palm. She didn't take her eyes off him though, what was the mark trying to tell her? She gasped as his eyes found hers. No longer were they green but fully black.

She woke in that instant.


	13. Following the Dread wolf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is extra long, I don't know why, I guess I got too excited with what was about to happen :D  
> Enjoy!

Evelyn sat on her bedroll until dawn, she would not find sleep again that night, she had never dreamt while here. She could still recall the first time she dreamt in the fade, she had scared herself awake and laughed about it for hours after. When she had admitted that to Bull, he had nudged her and mocked how it was probably because all spirits loved her so much, which was unnervingly true of late. She rubbed her face and sighed, that was not normal though, something with his face? Or maybe it was just a side effect of no fade? Pain lanced through her hand as the mark flared once more,

"What..! Ugh...why don't you just tell me what you want?" she asked her hand and rubbed the glowing mark, it faded and she sighed again, "Fine, be that way." 

She decided to pack up and carry on instead of trying to sleep. However the flaring in the mark only seemed to grow and sting more the closer she got to the hub of thievery. Would Brynjolf be happy to see her? She recalled the last time she spoke the to Nord. A flicker of yellow and red brushed passed her and she looked back, seeing a woodland elf running, shouts from what could only be guards came next.

"YOU! Elf, have you seen a girl run passed here?" the men were all out of breath it seemed, Evelyn glanced around and her eyes caught two green ones watching her. 

"I haven't, but may I ask why you are chasing girls and not on patrol, guard?" she asked and watched as the men whispered about her title and straightened up. The man who named her elf was pale and sweating still, he watched Evelyn for a moment and sighed.

"Damnit, she must have turned around...she stole from the Jarl and the Blackbriars, so we know she ain't with the guild, dragonborn. Sorry." He said and motioned his men to go back. Evelyn smirked and breathed out before glancing back to the three,

"I should have known, what did you take Sera?" she asked and smiled more as the woman huffed and walked around. She suited Skyrim armor and Evelyn noticed how she had tattoo's all over her now. But none like the bloodwriting she was probably used too.

"How'd ya know it was me?" The younger elf asked and looked at Evelyn from tip to toe, "Well, Sparky, this world agree's with ya. Where ya off too?" she asked and walked closer, now familiar and safe. 

"Exactly where you came from. It's good to see you're okay." Evelyn gave the girl a hug and breathed in slowly, "Varric is back at Whiterun, go to the nearby farmstead and get a ride, or come with me?" Evelyn smirked as Sera laughed and nodded.

"Let's go steal some shit, Sparky." she said and patted the girls shoulder. And off they went towards Riften, before giving Sera a change of clothes that is.

\--

The rest of the trek went by fairly calmly, if pulling Sera from taverns was classed as calm, and Evelyn breathed out from her nose. She had not missed that smell what so ever.

"Come." Evelyn smirked as Sera raised her eyebrows, 

"What the feck are we doin' in a graveyard, sparky?" Sera asked and shuffled her feet, Evelyn laughed faintly and walked to the usual spot and pushed the button. Enjoying the cuss word remark from Sera as it opened the secret path. "Slimy gets!" Sera had added as Evelyn walked down the steps.

"I woulda thought Bryn would have recruited you sooner, Sera, with that knack for trouble." Evelyn teased as they reached the inner sanctum of the thieves guild, Sera was grumbling as Evelyn glanced around. Silence fell upon everyone and she knew that it was odd for the guild master to be back. Evelyn walked to her desk with Sera close behind.

"Fecking 'ell, look at all tha' loot!" Sera said and looked through the many little things Evelyn had brought back from her time as a thief. "You got all this, Sparky?" Sera asked and breathed a whistle. "And here I thought you were as dumb as a doornail..." she muttered with a snicker. 

"She was the smartest thief I knew." Came a male voice that made Sera jump back as she eyed the nord. "Evelyn, welcome home, who is your friend?" Brynjolf smirked and tilted his head sligtly. Evelyn laughed at this and patted Sera on the back,

"A dear and silly friend, Sera, this is Brynjolf, second in command." she said and leaned against the desk, hiding the flaring mark. "I am looking for something, Brynjolf, and I need your help." she said and moved some papers out of the way. What she was looking for however, was confusing to say the least and she was sure Sera would have to say something about it.

"Sure, you are the guild master." He mused and walked to the desk, this comment made Sera snort with laughter, and nearly fall into the water.

"Her! Guild...phahahahahaha!" Sera made out as Evelyn glanced her way, "SHe couldn't even.....hahahahah! Oh gods!" she wiped her eyes and shook her head, "If only he knew Sparky." Sera mused and sat down in the chair.

"Sparky?" Bryn asked slowly, looking between the two elves, Evelyn sighed as she almost heard Sera wave her hand at him and laugh some more. Evelyn rubbed her head and knew that her friend saw the green glow on her palm.

"Lets focus, please...Anyway, I was looking for something like this..." she said and drew for him what she was looking for. "It might be in different shards." she said and looked carefully at Solas's orb she had drew. What came next worried her greatly.

"We already have it here, Lass." he said and looked at her, "it was part of some display in the college, we were told to stole it by some masked man and well, he never collected. Paid before we stole it too. The whole thing put us on edge and now your here, with a glowing hand and a troublesome elf. Well, what have you gotten yourself into lass?" he asked and looked at her, touching her arm warmly. Evelyn knew that Sera was watching with interest, 

"I am fine, Bryn, we are fine. I just need to figure this out." Evelyn said and squeezed his forearm before moving back to Sera. "grab what you want, Sera, we are moving on to the next spot." she said and walked around the desk. "take me to the orb, Bryn." she added with a frown. What was IT doing here too and who had asked them to steal it?

\---

Next stop, Winterhold College, and Sera was not happy with that at all. Mainly due to cold, but also more mages, that made the younger elf in such a happy mood.

"So you and Bryn, eh? I sense some tension there!" Sera said after she had stopped grumbling about mages,

"No actually, I used to have a massive crush on him but alas, he was always too busy." Evelyn said and smiled softly, "You can go to Varric if you want Sera, I won't feel bad." She said as she stroked the horse she was riding on. Shadowmere had been waiting outside for her and the reaction she gave nearly made Sera have a flashback to when Evelyn first saw the Bog Unicorn. Everyone had wanted it gone, everyone except Evelyn, and that meant the beast stayed. 

"Ouch, one sided romance, you tend to get at lot of them." Sera mused and was riding a normal mare, "I mean, Brynnie, Elvhen glory...who else?" Sera grinned and Evelyn groaned at Solas's nickname. Evelyn hadn't told Sera about the stupid one sided shout fest from before and she couldn't, it still didn't sit right with her.

"Farkas, nearly married that one...erm, there was a girl once, canna remember her name and some lad in Solitude. He bought me a drink to nurse my broken heart, first and only one night stand." Evelyn said and smiled faintly as Sera gasped mockingly.

"You nearly got married?" Sera asked and leaned on her horse and eyed her friend slowly. "Can't see ya getting married." she said to herself mostly, "What happened?" Sera asked, knowing the elf loved good gossip Evelyn smiled softly and shrugged.

"I woke up in Thedas." She said simply, there had been more to that, she had done all the proper traditions of wearing the necklace of Mara, giving it to Farkas and then...she missed her wedding day. "I forgot about it really, until Skyhold, and I had a moment to breathe. Then Solas and I wasn't sad." she said slowly, she heard the intake of breath from the other.

"Then the asshat left you and went off to play Elvhen glory. Double ouch. And then well, Skyhold fell and blah blah bad romance." Sera said and waved her arms, Evelyn laughed and nodded,

"I slept with him though, and he didnt shout that when we...er..." blush flared in her cheeks as Sera laughed more, "Nevermind." Evelyn said and frowned slightly, so was this what it came down too? Romance being bad news for her? Farkas hadn't even said anything to her when they bumpt into each other. Even though everyone knew the truth, that the gods had taken her elsewhere, like the time she went to Sovngarde. He just smiled and went about his way. Vilkas had said that he just seemed to forget her, the moment after she didn't turn up. And wasn't that weird? All those desires just, poof, gone. 

"Oh, Ellvvveehhhennnnn GLORY!" Sera cried out and galloped ahead, Evelyn laughed at this, truly laughed as the other elf made a fool of herself. Whenever her thoughts turned dark, Sera was there, with her crazy ways and made it all seem...brighter.

\-----

It seemed that night was similar to the night before Riften, sleep came soundlessly and sweetly. Lulling her into a realm she had never seen before. Dark walls and wet floors, cells and shouts. Evelyn explored slowly, fear in her chest as she came to a cell that looked too familiar. Chains on the floor which had one been used to bind her.

"I've been looking for you, Vehnan." came a voice that made Evelyn spin and freeze, the man before her looked broken and hurt and Evelyn felt her heart ache.

"Solas?" she whispered slowly, gasping as he came into the light, he was wearing that same armor he wore in the crossroads. 

"You do not answer my calls, Skyhold is gone and you remain elusive at best." He said softly and walked into the room, he was battered and bleeding, but he remained strong and watched her slowly. 

"Skyhold...gone?" She repeated and frowned more, "But we were both there, we..." she looked at him and saw the smile as he brushed her cheek slowly, lovingly.

"I recall with perfect clarity, my heart, but that was months ago." he seemed not to recall their fight at all, and she was grateful for it, "I woke in the temple of sacred ashes, with Iron Bull, Cullen, Vivienne and Cassandra, when we returned to Skyhold..." He placed his hand in hers and she gasped at the warmth there, they were in the fade no? Their secret space. He inched closer, like if he went too fast she would fade again. "The mountain was leveled and the sky was cracked. You were gone. And I have been searching this place for you. Trying to call you here." he said, which made sense as the mark flared in response to his words. Evelyn wanted to cry, this couldn't be real, no. He was in Skyrim with her, wasn't he? 

...Wasn't he?


	14. Losing Thy Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solas POV

It was like someone had punched him full force in the gut and then let him fall, that was what he could only guess what happened really, opening his eyes to a very much scarred sky didn't seem to help matters either. Where was he? How did he get here? He pushed himself up, his body complaining the whole way, until he was sat. Solas glanced around himself, he wasn't alone either it seemed. He could see quite clearly Iron bull sleeping by the stairway, Vivinne was crumbled near what he could only guess as Blackwall. 

"She is lost." came a male voice and Solas knew it was Cole, he rubbed his face and looked at the boy, he had taken his role as spirit seriously. "I can not see or hear her." he spoke some more and that made Solas frown, he never lost anyone like that before.

"Who?" Solas asked as he stood and rubbed his head, they were not in Skyhold,

"Evelyn." the word made all the ache disappear sharply, and a deep dread settle in his stomach, "She is there, but isn't." Cole said and turned to Solas, the elf frowned more at this. Cryptic was always annoying.

"Cole, what happened?" He asked, not looking forward to the answer, either way he knew one thing. He would find her. 

"A black hand reached out, demanding her return, they needed their dragon back." Cole said and walked towards Solas, "Loved and Hated, Needed and Not, They called for her. Harbringer, Master, Healer, Thief, Sister." Cole said slowly, testing the words out, "Maker begged, pleaded to wait, Thedas needed it's Inquisitor." Solas was not liking this one bit. How could Evelyn be both inquisitor and dragon? It just didn't make sense.

"What then Cole?" Solas asked as he picked his staff up. Knowing the others were slowly coming too. 

"The black one did not wait, it reached and took Skyhold, took her. But he took others. By accident." came his reply and Solas looked around. That was correct, there were people missing. "But worse still, she is being hunted. Masks and lies, pain and hurt, she is lost." Cole frowned more at this and seemed to play with a cloth. "We need to find her, Friend, save her...She..." he stopped and Solas knew why he did.

"She saved us." Solas put his hand on Cole's shoulder, "So we shall return the favor, what is hunting her Cole?" He asked as Iron Bull pushed himself up and grumbled about dirty tricks. Blackwall followed soon after.

"Black hand didn't mean too bring Demons, he only wanted his Dragon, but Demons went with them. Wears a mask that causing old pain, Pushing old buttons and tricking her into false sense of fate. Black wolves on her heels." He sighed and shook his head, it was obviously tiring him out too much to get a glimpse of them. Solas didn't like that image at all, she was in pain? An old pain? He sighed and shook his head, he would need help for sure. 

"Hey, Chuckles, what the hell did we drink last night?" Bull asked and stood slowly, Solas watched as Iron Bull scanned the field. The elvhen god knew exactly who the Qunari was looking for but Solas felt that same wince as he watched. Dorian was not here and something made Solas believe he was somehow with his heart. 

"I do not know, but something bad." Solas replied and smirked slightly as he noted the look of surprise on the males face. "Many of our inner circle seems to be displaced, along with our leader." he said and frowned more as he saw Josephine and Lelianna but no Cullen. That was even worse, was he jealous? Perhaps. 

"Who's missing?" Bull asked as he kicked Blackwall up and stretched faintly. 

"Apart from Evelyn? Dorian, Sera, Varric, Cullen and Cassandra." He said with a frown, "Where they are however, is a matter for debate, let us head back to Skyhold." He said and helped Josephine up. A thank you he merely nodded too. And once everyone was up, and thanks to Viv healed, they headed back towards their base. He and Lelianna made sure the others were fed and many were surprised by his hunting talent. 

However, none of them were prepared for the sight they received when they reached the same spot they had all once walked before. Solas felt his heart drop as he took in the sight. The castle that had been their home, the fortress that had been his reminder of his failures, and the building that held his hope was gone. The mountain it was on was only a pile of rubble. He breathed out as pain lanced through him, what could have the power to level a building within a moment? He didn't want to believe that it was something that had taken Evelyn. But it had. He walked towards the rubble, maybe something would help? Some clue. 

\---

Solas walked over the rocks slowly, there were a few items from Skyhold lay around, the others had spread out in search of people. He stopped as he came face to face with an Eluvian. He frowned more at it, Morrigan had taken her's with her and he had never allowed another to take it's place. He skimmed his hand over the frame and frowned more, it was cracked and therefore useless. 

"How did you get here, hmm?" He asked it, reading the inscription around the frame. He stopped and let his arm drop, this engraving was new, it had to be.

"What does it say?" Lelianna asked as she came to stand next to him, this was the first time she didn't hold a small contempt for him. Solas breathes slowly and looked at the human beside him, should he?

"The closest translation would probably be, 'Dragon soul and Wolf heart, entwined across worlds.' But it makes no sense to me." Solas said with a faint sigh. 

"Well, maybe it refers to the old stories of the Dragon Warriors?" Lelianna asked as she looked at it, Solas tilted his head at her and she smiled faintly. "Many Dalish believe that the Emerald knights from the Dales were based of the Dragoons of Arlathan. A guard for the people, with the fierceness of dragons. I am surprised you don't know." The spymaster said, obviously enjoying this far too much. She knew his real past now, as did most of them, so she really enjoyed this.

Why didn't he know of this? He rubbed his head, nothing came to his help, he only thought of the usual and obvious sentinels and they weren't the same...were they?

"The story I got told by a Keeper once, was that the Dragoon's defended the people against the first wave of attacks against the humans, but the leader of them was found dead in the palace. Guarding a room which had a single broken Eluvian inside. They never remade the order, as they could never find the heart of the dragon, whatever that means. But this must have been the mirror...right?" She asked and looked at the god. He was stumped. 

"We should set up camp." Solas said slowly, he needed to ask for help on this and somehow he felt deep in his gut that Evelyn was the key to all of this. They did set up camp and it wasn't until he was lay in his bedroll that the worry of her being gone hit him full force. She was somewhere else and he wasn't about to lose her a third time. He sighed and covered his eyes, when would he learn? At this rate anything close to him would feel loss. Sleep did not come easy that night, but what he found in the Fade was not what he wanted to find at all.

 


	15. Fading dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solas POV

It was like a very lucid nightmare, the days that followed seemed to grow darker and more filled with demons and twisted creatures. Solas found that since the 'dark hand' that took his home and his Evelyn the world itself seemed out of balance. The fade was becoming more and more realistic and as he walked down the familiar path of a fallen Arlathan he tried not to think on the burning in his arm and chest. What had Bull said? It had been a day or two ago since he left the comforts of Skyhold Camp,and it was beginning to show. Solas glanced down to the flickering image of his armor, he knew that he should let the glamour drop and show the same outfit of power to the spirits around him, but he knew deep down that he no longer wanted to be the Dread Wolf. 

What he wanted to be, right at this moment, was no one other then himself. He didn't want to be a trickster god or the fallen commander, he didn't want to be a mistake or the problem. Conflict and darkness seemed to be all that was left in his life and it was almost sad that he believed he deserved it. Solas glanced up, where was he going? He had no plan, no actual idea what he was supposed to do anymore, all spirits answered the same. She was lost. Evelyn was gone and there was no getting her back. Solas groaned slowly at his thoughts, how had he gone from hoping to giving up so quickly? Huffing to himself he focused on their bond, or at least what he believed was the bond between them. The actual thing was most likely his connection through his mark on her. 

It wasn't until the middle of the night when things turned desperate. Demons became more and more unpredictable, attacking on sight was usual but the fierceness and determination was not. No matter how many of his old friends he killed or told himself saved, there was always more. Many got hits in and he was growing weaker with each moment he stayed. He couldn't leave without seeing her once, nor could he leave without trying. Walking down into the cells of what was a mix between Haven and Skyhold, he wondered if he could stay hidden long enough to heal.

It was there, in the cells that he felt it, like a burning that healed the pain and he could try to deny that he didn't gasp and focus on it, but that is what he did. Standing and walking towards that damn pull she always had, and he almost cried as he saw her. Stood so silently in the middle of the room, looking around in wonder and worry. She recalled the place, surely, but the twist of darkness that now befell the land was new.

"I've been looking for you, Vehnan." the words were already out of his mouth as he stood at the fresh hold of the room, she turned and his heart almost died in the gasp that fell from her lips and the pain that bloomed behind her eyes.

"Solas?" her voice was like music and he never wanted it to go away, he walked slowly before breathing in the smell of her. Like a forest in spring, fresh and new, 

"You do not answer my calls, Skyhold is gone and you remain elusive at best." he replied as he walked deeper into the light, where she could see him properly, he was trying to remain truthful but seeing her made him want to forget everything but her.

"Skyhold...gone?" She repeated and frowned more, "But we were both there, we..." his heart was so confused as he watched her, brushing his hands over her skin to remind himself she was real for the moment.

"I recall with perfect clarity, my heart, but that was months ago." she was hiding something though, the flicker of hope that died all too quickly was almost sad enough to make him stop talking altogether. "I woke in the temple of sacred ashes, with Iron Bull, Cullen, Vivienne and Cassandra, when we returned to Skyhold..." He placed his hand in hers and the gasp from her lips made him want to kiss her, hold her close and never let go. "The mountain was leveled and the sky was cracked. You were gone. And I have been searching this place for you. Trying to call you here." he added, frowning more as the mark sparked under his touch, reminding him that their time was nearly over. 

"B-but...you..." she was tripping over her words and he knew that somehow, he was to blame, pulling her close he breathed in. The strength he needed was her, only her, and she was fading from him already.

"I love you, Evelyn, never doubt that. I will find you, I will always find you." He said softly and pulled her closer, their lips barely touching. A whimper falling from her as he put their foreheads together. "I will find a way to you, and I will make things right." Solas knew these words were hollow, but the hope they brought her was enough.

"I love you, Solas, tell Bull that his Dorian says hurry up." she gave a sad laugh and moved to kiss him. Fading completely, leaving him alone. Solas felt his knee's buckle as he closed his eyes and accepted that she was gone for now. Fate wouldn't let him be happy so easily it seemed, not that he blamed it at all. The lives he had destroyed needed to be paid for after all. At least one thing was good that came from this...

Evelyn still loved him.


	16. Winterhold's Weakness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The lead up to a new order.

Evelyn had spent the next few days mulling over her dream, if she could even call it a dream, maybe it was just her head trying to make herself feel better. Then again, what if it was true? What if her Solas was left in Thedas and the man that looked like him was merely trying to distract her, weaken her, haunt her? Another sigh escaped her lips as they crossed the final milestone on their path.

"Alright, that is it! Cheer up Sparky or So help me, I am going to knock you off your horse!" Sera huffed and looked back at Evelyn, only to see a small smile on her lips. Grumbling about elfy elves Sara focused on the path ahead. Evelyn smiled more and looked around, they were close now. Over the next ridge would be their destination. At least, what remained of it. 

"Sera, about Winterhold..." Evelyn started and almost heard the groan from her companion. 

"What about it?" Sera snapped back and then froze, the horse stopping too as they reached the top of the hill. Beneath them, the path swirled down into a ruin of a town. Buildings that were half here and half gone, the ones that were whole were over used and crumbling just like the earth. Sera would have called it a poor excuse for a hold if the beautifully sculpted bridge wasn't there. Arches and fresh metal gates, bright mage light that shot into the air like beams bloomed in their sight. The bridge gave way to a stronghold that made Sera curse under her breath, it's gleaming walls reflecting the sunlight in such a way that made Evelyn smile faintly. You could just see the smoke pillowing around the base of the structure, like the entire building was floating on air. "Magic." Sera spat and leaned back, looking at the town with a forelorn look. 

Magic always came with a price, and the town had paid for it.

"Mages, yes, but there is something you ought to know." Evelyn said slowly, wondering how she was to explain the fact she was guild master here too. "I can get you into the college." Evelyn mused as they reached the tavern. Sera was looking at her oddly for sure now, like she was only just seeing the true Evelyn. 

"Oh? Sneaky like?" Sera asked and looked around, like she enjoyed catching Mages with their pants down. The mental image made Evelyn laugh out loud and shake her head, breathing in and dismounting, Evelyn looked at her friend.

"I run the college, besides, you probably have magic too." Evelyn teased and laughed as Sera demanded she take comment back. Walking towards the gate and seeing a new woman stood there, without even speaking though the girl squeaked and let them both in. Bowing quickly and blushing a bright shade of red.

"Archmage! I-I...welcome home!" the young girl stuttered and looked between the two before letting them pass without words, of course, Evelyn was bemused by this. Sera less so. Mainly due to one fact, Evelyn was no mage. The more they walked across the stone bridge, the more this ate away at the thief. How could someone like Evelyn, who had never shown an interest in pick locking, or shown any magical talent be the head of two branches that required two totally different attributes?

"Your a mage." Sera finally said that made Evelyn stop slightly, looking back as they reached the main arch which lead into the courtyard. Evelyn looked at her friend with a soft, but sad, smile.

"I am. Well, I was, here at least. I was also a thief, assassin, warrior and occasional bard. My life here was different to Thedas, Sera, when i got there I left all that behind." Evelyn said truthfully and squeezed her friends arm, "I am still me, just there is...more." Evelyn added and waited to see her friend's reaction.

"No wonder you sided with the robes, did Elvhen glory know?" Sera asked, eyeing her friend with distrust and bemusement. An odd mix for sure.

"Nope, he still doesn't." Evelyn replied as they walked deeper into the college, "I haven't used magic since I got the mark Sera, I don't know how it would react so I don't plan on doing it either." Sera was grinning now, which was unnerving as they reached the rooms. The elf had a plan to get even, Evelyn wondered against who as she opened the door, the gleam of mischief in her eye always caused Evelyn to be giddy. It normally meant a prank was about to be set.

\---

It took a whole two hours, (Sera counted...outloud) before they found Tolfdir and he finally took them to the new students. Evelyn had forgotten how easy it was for the old mage to be distracted, and with her return there was allot he wanted to say. Evelyn slipped away from her old friend and turned, there he was, leaning against the inner well watching another student fail miserably to a spell she knew Dorian had already mastered. Evelyn walked to his side and leaned against the stones too, as Sera most likely set booby traps, maybe the prank she was planning and stole gold (they had a long chat on soul gems before they came here).

"You could help him." Evelyn started and tilted her head faintly, the boy accidentally set fire to his bed and was desperately trying to put it out.

"Why bother? This is entertaining." He replied without looking up, "I mean the poor boy will probably burn his eyebrows off." He finally looked at her. He froze in place, his eyes burning into her, as she looked at him with a bemused smile. Was he not expecting her? 

"On occasion, but I wouldn't want to have pay to repair the building. Being Archmage means I have to cough out my own money."  Evelyn mused faintly and laughed as his eyes narrowed on her, scanning her over for any sign that she could be who she said she was. A shapeshifter or demon with her face maybe?

" _My_ Evelyn does not have Magic. You are a fraud." Dorian huffed and turned away, folding his arms in that stroppy way she loved so much. His Evelyn?

"Mmmm? Sera, what do you think?" Evelyn asked as she looked back to the struggling student. Dorian blinked and turned to his other side, where the younger thief merely shrugged. Like she was too busy adding two very volatile ingredients together for fun. Dorian looked back to Evelyn and narrowed his eyes once more. Looking at her with some new emotion as he waved his hand, the fire gone within the instant.

"Who else of our little family have you found and roped in?" he asked with a huff, "Have you..."

"He's back in Thedas, we have Varric though. And apparently there is Cullen and Cass. I think they are both in Solitude." Evelyn said and smiled more, "I need your help getting back, so care to go on another adventure?" she asked, hearing Sera's snorted laugh as purple smoke erupted from the mixing tables. "Sera!" Evelyn rubbed her head as the elf appeared with a purple face. 

"That was wicked! I made bombs, look!" Sera held up four small pouches that gleamed like the night sky, Dorian laughed and nodded almost happily. "We done? We have a long trek no?" she asked and slipped them into her bag. Grinning like a cheshire cat.

"I will come with you, you are one of my closet friends. Though, we will need supplies. Any money to get said supplies? Like Horses?" he asked with a look that made Evelyn giggle, he doubted her ability. 

"Keep her out of trouble and leave everything to me." She mused and patted his shoulder before heading to her old quarters. It was left untouched, the plants growing brilliantly and her chests seals unbroken. How many days had she spent in here? Writing about different worlds such as Oblivion and Mora's domain, she had wondered if there were others outside of the known realms. And she had been caught by one of them, Thedas...


	17. Winterhold's Strength

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evelyn's plan of action.
> 
> Solas finds the truth.

Walking alone through the open spaces of her quarters gave Evelyn pause for the moment, she had hidden a great deal of loot here before she went through the mirror and even if she hadn't returned not a single person could break her spells on the locks. Dragonborn blood locks. She had Delphine to thank for that piece of magic and she knew that there wouldn't be one in Skyrim any time soon. Kneeling down by the chest she cut her hand on the lock and looked back as it clicked open. Inside lay gems and bags of gold, weapons and books, everything they would need to carry on. 

"I see you have powers even I didn't think you could have." came a voice that made her freeze, looking up through the stone window she saw him. Brushing his fingers against the tree lights. "All I knew of you was wrong, wasn't it?" He asked, his eyes turning to her and glaring once more. All those feelings came rushing back to her, but instead of feeling the heartbreak she felt the hope too. Twisted deep within each other. Happiness and Sadness intertwined in a dangerous dance, she was fighting something that she did not yet understand and it all came down to one thing really.

"Solas..." she breathed out, or was it him? Evelyn's love and devotion to the old god had caused many problems in the passed year or so, and even now she was facing something that reminded her so much of the man. She tried to recall her dream, of his worry and kind eyes, but if he was hers still then who was this? "No, you are not him." She said and stood. Her hand lingering on her bow and quiver as she watched the man before her smile. Walking slowly around the walls to face this problem, but each step made her heart beat faster and what could only be named as fear creep up.

"Oh? and you know that for certain?" He asked and moved back so she was face to face with him, "You know me that well, mm?" he asked as she felt the hairs on her back stand on end. His tone was cold and full of anger. Was that towards her? How did he even get in here without her hearing? The door remained closed, she didn't hear it open or close and as she watched him she knew that this was more then just them. More then just two people in one area. 

"Solas would never hurt me like you did." Evelyn felt her voice waver, he had once and that was enough for the man to laugh, "So why do you wear his face?" she asked, gulping as he merely looked back at the tree. Her words made him relax and somehow that scared her more, was he tired of pretending or was her dream merely a memory? Was Solas really gone and this being before her that radiated hate the only thing left?

"Your belief in your mate is honorable, I haven't met anyone who figured it out as fast as you, dear Evelyn." He purred and looked back at her, his once clear eyes were pitch black. So it was true, Solas was in Thedas and she was alone with this creature. Evelyn recoiled back, hitting one of the pillars as she watched him close the distance between them. His fingers were cold as they brushed along her jawline, it was almost tender in the way he did it, but the smile was dark. Shivers spread through her as she refused to look away, he was confusing and that was not good.

"What do you want?" Evelyn asked, holding her breath as he ran his fingers over her lips.

"You." He purred as he closed the distance between them, "Your strength, your determination and your skill. You battle gods and demons, you win every battle you face and that, my dear  _Inquisitor_ , is what I need to lead my army. You will be mine, but only once I break your spirit." he hissed the last words as he kissed her and disappeared into black smoke. Evelyn slid down the wall and blinked into the empty space. Her eyesight became blurry as tears spilled over, whatever this thing was, it was determined to destroy her? Emotionally at least. 

What was she supposed to do? She could't do this on her own. 

_You are not alone._

The voice made her jump, looking around once more she found nothing but empty space, she had heard something for sure. Pushing herself up and wiping her eyes, Evelyn tried not to focus on the dark monsters that hunted her steps now. She needed to get to Solitude, to find Cullen and Cassandra. The six of them could figure this out, but she would need more help then her friends.

_Then you shall have it._

Turning around again, she looked around the cold stone room. Something or someone was talking and yet, nothing she could see.  Evelyn shook her head and filled her bag with stuff they would need. She already had a horse, they only had to buy Dorian one and be off. Food was packed, water too, tents and bedrolls, she would have to start using her magic after all. Protective barriers, wards and maybe even a protection spell or two for their dreams. Evelyn washed her face, mainly to hide the tears, before returning to her friends. 

Dorian was none too happy about horseback riding, but he did enjoy Evelyn's books that she had given him. Her own research on everything Skyrim related. He was even more interested in the term Dragon Born then she was. Apparently, having the body of a mortal and spirit of a dragon was amazing. He had demanded a demonstration when the moment called for it and Evelyn didn't know which shout to use. She would leave it to chance for now as they started down the road towards the capital. 

\--- Elsewhere ---

"So, she's alive but in danger?" Leliana asked as she looked through what could only be described as a mountain of paperwork, Solas leaned on his staff as he focused on the spymaster. 

"Chuckles thinks that some big bad took her. The others were just..." Bull started, he was slouched in a chair opposite the desk, 

"Collateral." Solas interrupted and sighed, this whole situation was annoying and unpredictable. "There is a path though, and it can be taken by others if we can find it." Solas added and looked at the others. Cole and Blackwall were sat around the table, listening intently. The group were currently residing in Redcliffe tavern and thanks to Evelyn's friendship with the king they were staying without paying. Solas, however, was still coming and going from his home in the crossroads. Looking for answers on who Evelyn's parent's were. And what the spymaster had told him about the dragon warriors. 

_Dread Wolf._

The voice was smooth, like the breeze and gentle like a mother's voice, but it wasn't one he was used too. He let the others discuss ideas as he focused on the voice that seemed to only reside within his head. Who was it? What did they want with him?

_Come to your Eluvian.  
_

Solas frowned slightly at that, the eluvian? He excused himself, without them worrying about him, walking towards the gateway he saw it open. It glowed and shimmered with magic, the tingle of it on the air was enough to make him calmer. He would never be so foolish to leave it open though, running his hand over it and watching the ripples, he knew that whatever the voice was. It wanted him to go through. So he did. 

The mirror led him to a different place, not the crossroads he was used too, but an open field with a castle in the distance. Solas could just make out the spires that pierced the sky like cracks in a glass. Mist covered the ground and flowers bloomed without colour. The old god glanced down at himself, still wearing the same outfit at least, though as he looked up he came face to face with a man. He was dressed in fur armor that stood out for a mile, a sword at his waist and fierce eyes. Solas noted the dragons in the distance, circling the castle.

_Welcome, Dread Wolf._

"You know my name, but I do not know yours." Solas replied, standing firm as the man merely bowed his head slightly and stood relaxed. 

_I know you through my daughter, perhaps you know her? Evelyn._

The name cut him deep, so after all this time of looking. He had been found instead, but something still seemed off. This whole place was new, yet it seemed familiar somehow.  
"And who are you?" Solas asked slowly, looking back towards the dragon. There were more now, flying around the sky, but not destroying the castle. They seemed to be...guarding it?

_My name is not important, I simply am a guide for you now._

Solas found this odd, a being that didn't care what it was called...or perhaps the spirit couldn't recall? Be it recalled Evelyn with precision. The softness and care in it's voice as it said her name made him wonder how a girl that lived now could be related to a man that reminded him so much of history.    
"Guide me through what?" he asked, this was different now, he was at a loss and knowledge was power. "Where is this place?" he added and walked closer to the spirit who moved with him.

_The empty space between worlds. Long ago, before even you were born into godhood, two worlds that were completely separate crashed together._

The image behind him shattered as green light flashed, Solas watched transfixed as the world shattered around them. The dragons roared in anger as the castle remained in one piece but the land around it seemed to burn with the green fire. Solas watched as another building tumbled into the landscape, the new structure made him frown. It was Arlathan. Or at least, the start of it, he had seen pictures to know this. 

_The world that crashed into this one was named Skyrim, it was in chaos at the time, and that chaos spread into this one. However, the gods of my old world sent a man through, to help bring stability. That man was dragon born in that world. This one had no name for him, so he swore his sword to the leader. You knew that woman as Mythal._

Solas frowned as he tried to recall the first few times he had met with his friend, she always had a hand maiden and a warrior present. Was that man him? But that would mean...

_Yes._

Solas turned to the man and frowned more, his thoughts were not safe here it seemed. None of it made sense, surely someone would recall having a warrior of that strength around. And if that was true, why did Arlathan fall? Solas shook his head as he watched the castles join and become the city he knew all too well. If that man was from here, and there, then Evelyn was too. 

"Evelyn was not born here, was she?" Solas asked, watching as the sky ripped with green magic before calming down once again.

_No. When the bonds between friends crumbled and Mythal fell, my wife and Evelyn passed through the only tie between our worlds. I remained behind and fell victim to the same terror your people now faced. I have you to thank for stopping the monster that once led them all._

Solas had never been...thanked for what he did, but hearing it now put a part of his guilt to rest. What an odd feeling. He needed to know more, but part of him didn't want to. Evelyn had been born in the world that crashed into theirs, she had grown up there instead of Thedas. Did she even know her lineage? She would...should...have the magic from then, but she showed no talent for the craft. Solas recalled her pinpoint dreaming though, she was a walker of the fade through chance and seemed to enjoy exploring everything she could. No matter what or where. 

_The mirror still ties the bonds to the realms. You must go with the others, help defeat the shadows that threaten Skyrim and then destroy the ties between the realms. Evelyn must remain in Thedas for this world to be spared it's destruction. Dread wolf, I must ask you to help save my daughter. The mirror lies deep within what remains of the temple of sacred ashes. Good luck on your quest, wolf, may you find better luck then I._

Solas watched as the man walked ahead, his shape changing into one of the dragons. Dragon born. What a weird title, he couldn't say anything really, he was a wolf in nature.   
"Dareth Shiral, dragon." Solas replied and stepped back, finding himself in front of the eluvian once more. Now with a clear destination in mind. A sense of disappointment ran through him though, Evelyn had kept that part of herself secret...was it his fault? Did he hurt her too much for her to be honest about who she was? Or was she afraid of admitting that she didn't belong here when it was so obvious she did. Whatever the reason, Solas would find her. He would always find her.


	18. Reflections

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> May the dread wolf take you.

They were about a days ride away from Solitude when Evelyn made them stop and set camp, they didn't question her nor did she notice their lack of complaints. The wind called to her like it had done many times, a whisper that lulled her towards something she knew was unnatural. Telling her friends to guard the horses and supplies, she went ahead alone. Evelyn climbed down the rocky hill slowly, her hand deep within the dirt as she followed her heart. When was the last time she let her hair down and breathed in the nature? When was the last time she felt one with the forests? Evelyn knelt by some trees and looked ahead. 

There was a cave entrance not far off from her position, unguarded and untouched, like a giant crack in the mountain. The wind blew towards the cave and she knew somehow that she was needed in there. Deep within the earth once again. Evelyn walked slowly, timidly, like she was worried this was a trap. Set by the monster that was currently set on destroying her. There was a cold rush of air, the strong smell of water and earth, it reminded her so much of the temples in Thedas. The long forgotten stories that remained even if the people didn't. 

The floor was dry but the walls were damp and smooth, like a rock polished to perfection, and with each step she felt a thrum of energy pass through her. The calm mark sparked and flared violently, bringing light to the dark cave. Evelyn slipped down a step and gasped as the narrow passage bloomed, a giant cavern lay before her with giant marble pillars keeping the ceiling up. The mark sparked again, causing braziers near by to burst with veilfire. There were mosaics on the wall that depicted great battles, they were similar to the ones she had seen in Mythal's temple. Yet, these were darker. Evelyn pushed herself up and walked down the rest of the broken steps into the space. The green light only caused the pictures to shimmer and move, like shadows danced over them, this place was dark and long since abandoned.

Moving through the room was easy, but each step made her pause for a moment, she wasn't safe here. She reached the other end of the cavern and pushed open what was cold under her touch, it had to be a metal of some kind but none that she knew of. The inner room was far more delicate then the hall she had just walked. Evelyn felt her heart tighten at the familiar shape. It was a rotunda. Each side of the room was painted, just like Solas had painted her's. She turned slowly, looking at each one in wonder and awe. This room just felt different, secure and hidden, like a piece of her heart had pulled her here for a reason.

Evelyn stopped when she saw one of the walls shimmer, the wall...no, the painting was cracked. Walking closer she touched the wall only to find it was liquid, stepping back as a gasp escaped her lips, this was no picture. But the same mirror that took her to Thedas. Had it been moved? Or...had it moved itself? She looked back around the room, there must be more pieces of these hidden across Skyrim. With hidden treasure deep within their walls. Her back to the mirror only meant one thing, she didn't see the sparks from her hand ignite the words around the mirror's edge. Nor the shapes shimmer and push through.

"Evelyn."

\---

Dorian slumped against the small pile of wood that Sera had tried to light, he watched slowly as the little elf got more and more angry at the small task, he knew that kind of anger was not towards the actual wood or lack of fire. But towards the whole situation they found themselves in. Dorian rolled his eyes and clicked his hands, causing the wood to ignite and Sera groan in defeat and fall back.

"Do you think she is okay?" Sera asked with a small frown on her face that surprised Dorian, there were many times that Sera surprised him with her sanity, this was another one of those times it seemed.

"Of course, she is always okay." Dorian replied with certainty, though she had been silent through their ride, letting himself and Sera bicker like children. She hadn't even laughed when Dorian had made Sera's horse gallop ahead.

"I don't think she is." Sera added and looked at the sky, "this place brings out weird things. I just want to go back." Now that sounded like the Sera he knew, pouting and ready to shoot something with her bow. 

"At least she isn't alone." Dorian mused and drank some water, that wasn't right though, she was alone right now. "This land is strange indeed, shall I put up the tents?" He asked and smiled more, Sera huffed and pushed herself up. Dirt and leaves in her blonde hair now. He only managed to hear a part of a cuss word as she stood, knowing she was going to do that. So he would focus on food. 

It was that moment that the sky became a terrible black and lightning flashed across the sky. The horses, except Shadowmere, became restless as the clouds swirled around one of the hills not far from their spot. Dorian stood just in time to see a flash of green lightning hit not far from where they were. The next moment rain poured so heavily that Dorian was soaked before he managed to pick their supplies up. The entire land became a dark haze. 

"Get the horses! We need to find shelter!" Dorian shouted, hearing her aye as they followed the direction that Evelyn had gone in. The rain poured heavier and heavier as they reached the cave, the only option for shelter. Venturing in with the horses, they found the same hall and decided to set up camp there. If Evelyn was near by, then she would find them easily. Unaware what was happening behind the sealed doors just in front of them.

\---

Evelyn turned when her name was called and came face to face with a reflection of Solas, he looked better but the cut below his eye had yet to heal properly. She walked back towards the image and reached out. Only to meet a shield keeping them apart. She could see and hear him, but not feel him close to her, what was happening?

"Vehnan." He had that sad smile on his face, the slight tilt in his head as he gazed at her, her chest felt like it was caught in an iron grip and she could barely breathe.

"Solas...how?" she asked and brushed her hand over the frozen glass, his hand reached up and touched on the other side. She wanted to cry, they were so close and yet apart once more. Evelyn didn't even take in the background of where he was, no, her mind simply focused on him. The way he was stood, and the way he reached out to her was what kept her eyes on him. What made the tears come was what he was wearing, the dread wolf armor, that brought back terrible memories and the truth. He was a whole other world away.

"That is not important, we only have a short time before it fails and..." Evelyn felt the sob bubble up, she closed the distance between herself and the mirror's edge. Both hands on the glass as well as her forehead. "Vehnan..." his tone cut deeper as she looked up at him, there was a tear falling from his eye as he did the same. One heart, that was what she always said, and now she was separated by that. "Ar lath ma." he whispered softly, she felt another sob escape her and nodded.

"and I you." she mumbled, "I am scared, Solas, things are changing and I can't stop them. What do I do? I don't know what's real or what's a dream anymore. How can I save anyone if I can't save myself?" she asked in a rush, looking at the man who was the only one to see the weaker side of her soul. He had accepted that but rejected her anyway later on. 

"You are not alone. I will find my way to you and we will face this together, do not let this thing get inside your head Vehnan, you are stronger then you realize." He said softly and she noticed the wince in him. He wanted to hold her tightly, keep all these pieces of her together for as long as possible. 

"I haven't felt right since I came back Solas, I feel like I am losing my mind...I need you." she sobed and saw the image start to crack more. He looked alarmed for a moment and tried to say something, but it only came back jumbled. "Solas? no! Solas!" she cried as the image finally faded and left her with only her reflection. Hands balled into fists she hit the glass in anger and desperation. Tears running down her cheeks as she screamed out loud, it only stopped when she heard the heavy crash of thunder and rain. She slid down and curled up. Finally letting herself cry. Unaware of the storm outside that was washing their tracks away. How she had managed to stay up, smiling and focused all that time was beyond her. 

Evelyn had died, come back and lost it all within moments. Why did nothing ever good happen to her? Where was her happiness hiding? Why did she feel broken like the glass behind her? Evelyn cried herself to sleep there, curled up by the mirror, and it wasn't until the early hours of the following morning that Dorian found her. Seeing his leader and his friend like this was hard, so he simply let her sleep. Covering her with a blanket before heading back to the camp fire. Saying only three words to Sera, who paled at the mention of them.

"You were right." 


	19. Shards of glass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solitude awaits.

Evelyn had woke aching and tired, weak and her mood flat, she didn't want to move at all. But the smell of cooking meats and the shiver of cold roused her from the hard floor. She wrapped the blanket around herself and looked back at the mirror. Her hitting it yesterday had caused the already broken glass to crumble slightly, so she picked up a piece and slipped it into her pocket. Steps were hard when her entire being felt heavy, she leaned against the door frame as she watched Sera and Dorian getting along while eating. 

"She lives!" Sera mused and leaned back, grinning at the other elf, "Sleep well Sparky?" she asked with a snicker. Evelyn frowned and didn't reply as she sat herself down by the fire. Warmth was what she needed right now, but the way both her friends were looking at her made her wonder what exactly they believed had happened last night. She had never gone back to them and somehow they had found her, she blinked as Dorian passed her food and a drink of water. 

"So what's the plan, Evelyn? Carry on? The storm has stopped." Dorian mused faintly and ate himself, not pushing for anything or even demanding why she was lay near a mirror. He had that soft smile on his face, the same one he wore after Solas had broken her heart and she had spent her time pining over the elf. Dorian had been very caring and strong for her, he had helped her on so many levels that she would always owe him. 

"Carry on. We need to find Cass and Cullen." Evelyn said softly, looking around their little hide away. "Though, I think we should use this place as our base. If we are ever going to get home, this will be the heart of the operation." Evelyn nodded and smiled ever so slightly. That way, she could be close to the magic of Solas without seeing him. And the wards here meant one thing, that demon would not find her here, she would be safe within these walls. "I will send word to Varric, do you want to stay as well? You can make this place...livable and read. Without Sera. She can come with me." She added with a soft smile.

"You read my mind like a book, my dear, I will play guard dog." He mused and finished his food, "be careful, though, yes?" he added with a smirk that calmed what nerves she could feel bubbling over. Sera snorted into her water and laughed, which made them both look at her. Maybe it would be better to keep Sera here too, her devious nature in the capital might cause more problems. 

"You have a house in Solitude, right, sparky?" Sera asked and jumped up, stretching with glee in her eyes. Evelyn merely nodded slowly, watching the elf with worry at what she was planning. "Great, I need somewhere to test my theory. Lets go then. See ya later, mage, have fun with yourself!" she laughed more and walked out of the cave. Her horse following almost too willingly. Evelyn watched with confused eyes, and looked towards Dorian for clues, only to find a similar look on his face. They both shrugged as Evelyn stood and went to Shadowmere, the horse had been hers for so long now, it was almost like a piece of herself in animal form. 

Once outside, they climbed on their horses and headed out. She enjoyed the talk about silly things (from bee bombs and the night powder that Sera had concocted at the college) as they went along the road, Evelyn believed that this was a distraction from the dire situation they now faced. Evelyn found herself thinking back on Solas, hoping he wasn't taking chances just to find her and hoping that he wasn't risking everything just to see her again. Though, it was nice to feel needed and wanted in the twisted way this was. All those days of waiting for him, wishing he would talk to her, and now it was the other way around. Sera was taken in by the beauty for the moment, the trek up towards the town was beautiful and the city itself was breath taking. Evelyn smiled faintly as Sera became giddy and excited as they walked through the square. 

No executions today it seemed, thankfully, Evelyn walked up the ramp towards the barracks. If the two best warriors of the inquisition were anywhere, it would be here. It was there, stood in the shadows of the stone arch when she saw him. He was no longer wearing that fur but pure steel. Evelyn watched with amazement as the man who had battled his own demons for years stand tall, talking to three younger men who seemed to idolize him. He had his hand on the tip of a beautifully crafted steel sword and had a shield on his back. He looked like one of the knights out of Varric's stories, nobel and ready to fight anything.

"Rutherford." Evelyn called, watching the boys all tense at the familiarity of the call. She smirked faintly as the male she knew was a softie deep down turn to shout and watching that shout die in his throat as he saw her. Shock and what she couldn't really put her finger on flash through his eyes. He didn't stop before he practically ran to her and held him tightly against himself.

"Evelyn." He breathed and put her at arms length, looking her over and smiling more, she had never seen him smile like that before. "You are here, thank the mak-" He stopped and glanced around, causing the elf to laugh a little finally. 

"Maker?" she mused and he softened and nodded. 

"Hey! You found curly!" Sera jumped on Evelyn's back and ruffled her hand through Cullen's hair. Causing him to grumble and step back, the action made Evelyn smile more. It was nice to see they all remembered each other. 

"Hello, Sera." He mused. Evelyn noticed how all the recruits were watching in awe and amazement, maybe they didn't see his kindness as much as she did? or perhaps he had gotten too used to being a general that he lost sight of why he was fighting here. "Why are you here?" he asked them both and took another step back. Closing off that emotion once again, she never understood why he did that, they were friends no?

"Looking for you and the Seeker, operation return to Thedas is a go! Where is the uptight one anyway?" Sera asked and let go of Evelyn before putting both hands on her hips, Evelyn smiled more and looked back at Cullen. He was frowning though and that made her wonder why. He motioned for them to follow, and they did. Cullen led them inside towards a map room, one that Evelyn recalled quite well. They all stopped in the open doorway and Evelyn felt her gut twist. There she was, stood in gold and red, leaning on the map. 

"Ah, Cullen, good. We have word that a solider of the stormcloaks has just entered the city, by the name of..."

"Stormblade." Evelyn said with a frown and walked into the room, the guards around Cassandra suddenly drew their swords and pointed them at her. What a welcome that was. "Evelyn Stormblade. Right hand of the Stormcloaks. Nice to see you, Cassie." she added and smiled as Cassandra watched with narrowed eyes before turning to Cullen. Nodding once and looking back at the girl. Cullen got all the guards out, without a single word, and that left them very much alone.

Evelyn opened her mouth to say something but that was cut short as Cassandra pulled her into a crushing hug. Almost as hard as Cullen had. Evelyn held tightly back, breathing out all that tension that had built up since the mirror. 

"I am glad you are alright, Evelyn." Cassandra said softly and closed her eyes tightly. They had been friends for the longest times, Cass had been the first one to believe in her and that meant allot. Even now. "I take it you have a plan?" she added and smiled faintly, before letting go that is.

"Of course, ready to face the world again? As my sister-in-arms?" she added and smiled more. Cassandra nodded again and put their hands together in a way that Evelyn had only seen warriors do. "Then grab your sword, we have somewhere we need to be." Evelyn smiled more and moved back. Cullen and Sera soon rejoined them. Evelyn was not alone, she had to keep reminding herself this. 

It was time to fight back and go home.


	20. Fields of Gold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for the feels that are about to come, I don't think this is going to be a happy story after all? The ending will at least...heh...

The days went by and seasons changed, the longer she went without hearing from her heart or seeing the demon that haunted her dreams, the more agitated she became. Somehow it had spiraled into a whole battle, they had collected three other eluvians in the time since they found Cullen and Cassandra. And not once had they glowed with magic or even showed her a glimpse of Thedas. Evelyn wanted to go home, though she was losing sight of what that was, glancing around the dimly lit campfire to her friends she worried they were losing faith and making Skyrim their home. Varric had once again become a writer and his books were the best sellers in each hold. Cassandra had taken the Imperial force and made a defense group that protected all within Skyrim. Cullen had become colder then usual, only to her though, and she had begun to wonder why. Maybe her own mind was fighting her now and the darkness she could see was seeping in slowly.

Evelyn wouldn't be surprised really. She had died once already and that had yet to be addressed, the quiet whispers and small tight smiles made her feel more on edge. They were all chatting happily now, and she was once again fading into the background. A ghost. 

_Evelyn..._

It was a whisper against her neck, that sent shivers down her spine. A gentle caress that lulled her to remove herself from the fire. To submerge herself in the shadows that danced like demons. Evelyn breathed silently as she walked towards the main room. How many days had it been since she came here? How many had passed in Thedas? Was everyone okay? Or was the world broken beyond repair? Evelyn felt the brush of cold air run up her arm as she walked towards the stone doors. Opening it, hearing the slight creak and burst of laughter made her jump. No one had noticed her disappearance from the chatter...would they miss her at all anymore?

_Evelyn..._

This time it was more urgent, pleading and begging her attention to change, so she did. Her eyes fell upon the first broken mirror. It flickered and flared as she walked closer. The magic in the room swelled like she was being pushed deep under water. The heat grew and the sparks arched off the glass. Focusing on the flickering images, Evelyn got closer and narrowed her eyes. A women. Or at least it looked female, flowing brown hair and silver chains tying it back. Elvhen ears could be seen and her robe was elegant and rich.

"Who are you?" Evelyn asked slowly, not being able to make out her face or why she was being pulled through. Stopping herself from touching the glass the girl in the reflection sighed with relief and put her hands up against the glass.

_A memory. Please, listen..._

Evelyn frowned as she saw the mouth move but no sound, the woman looked panicked and looked behind her before facing ahead again. She breathed on the glass and drew letters on the mist. Evelyn tilted her head and stopped all breath as the letters pulled together to spell one thing and one thing only.  _Solas._ Everything seemed to crack more, whatever hold she had was failing, soon she would have nothing left. Not even herself. Evelyn noted the cracks that appeared more in the glass, spreading over the image faster and faster. 

Perhaps the reason she had not seen or heard from her love was simple? Maybe he had been afraid of losing the one way to talk to her? So he wouldn't risk losing that bond or that link between worlds. Solas had been known to sacrifice everything and yet he was still afraid of being alone. He would have to face the truth like she would too. Hero's never seemed to find their happy ending, there was always another bad guy or problem and always another issue to face. Family. Home. Life. All benefits that she would never have for long periods of time. 

_He....help...time..._

Evelyn frowned and looked so confused as the girl pushed forward and spoke faster, the words flooded through and caused the room to flare and freeze all at the same time, the door becoming shut as the mirror began to ripple. Whatever it was made the worry and fear pool and swell deep in her heart. Pin shot through her side and Evelyn tried to ignore it but the girl seemed to note it. Banging on the mirror, Evelyn watched as the girl become hysterical.

_You...get...Thedas, now!_

Evelyn opened her mouth to reply but ended up being pulled back by an unknown force as the mirror shattered, showering her in shards of glass and stinging pain. Evelyn looked up at the remaining golden frame, blue lightning shot through and rippled over the frame. Shouts came after, worried calls for her name and bangs at the now half frozen and half melted door. The power that must have come through to cause the rock to burn like that was frightening as Evelyn lay there. The glittering pieces turned golden in the fire's light and she found herself feeling empty and hollow. The thought that remained, the all consuming thought that cut through all the memories and dreams she once possessed was simple. Evelyn had nothing left to lose anymore, she had forgotten her promise and her condition to being alive...

Evelyn had to save Thedas or she would return to the same condition she had been before Pan.

Dead.


	21. Broken Worlds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Black wolves on her heels, time running out, what was she supposed to do?

The smoke cleared eventually, leaving the bare stone room almost eerily quiet. Evelyn couldn't take her eyes off the once golden frame, it's shine long gone and the once reflective glass was littered all around her. The ground around the eluvian was still smoking as she lay before it. The cuts on her arms were bleeding, but she knew she would be alright. After all, Evelyn had faced worse and lived.

"They all look at you for help, it's almost funny." A dark laugh echoed, causing Evelyn to hold her breath as the shadows became the darker Solas once again. He was no longer pretending to act like him, like her Solas. The black eyes and new armour made him look every part the demon god of tricks and rebellion. "Their noble hero, so strong and steady. Can any of them really see how broken you actually are?" he asked, crouching before her. His tone was teasing but his smile was harsh. Why was her pain funny to him? Words died in her throat as she watched him smile more, running his cold fingers over her freshly cut face. 

"Do any of them actually see you? Or do they only see the image you made?" he asked slowly, venom dripping off his words, "I see you. The real you. The damaged, scared and lonely little girl who only wants to be accepted like she does for them. It's such a shame that you can never have that. You will always be alone. I will be there to make sure of it." he mused and ran his hand ever so slowly down her neck. Shivers erupted all over her skin and she had never felt so helpless. "No one can save you. Not even your precious little...  _wolf._ " he mused more. The damage he was inflicting was beyond anything Evelyn could cope with. Physical pain could be ignored, but emotional pain was always there. Always constant. 

"My work is almost completed, you are so close to being mine." He was enjoying this too much, "When your time in Skyrim is up, I will claim you as my own." he was so close now, she could almost smell him. The sweet smell of flowers mixed with the deep earth she related to her Solas. How could he be so similar, yet so different? How could a scent so calming now become so terrifying? She couldn't stop her heart beating fast or her hands shake ever so slightly. Did he see the effect he had? How hard it was to remind her that this figure, this being, was not her heart. He was a mere imitation. A poor copy.

"The damnable wolf will regret ever hurting you so badly. Maybe if he loved you, you wouldn't be so screwed right now," he whispered teasingly, moving his fingers under her chin. He made her stand and Evelyn tried to ignore how willing she was and how easy he could lead her. Was she that tired? Evelyn heard the shouts of her friends and the banging on the doors. This made her recall herself and recoil from his touch.

"I-I am not some...some play thing!" Evelyn attempted, though her voice was not yet strong enough to be convincing. The man before her just laughed and pulled her face to his. His fingertips dug into the cuts, causing a burning pain to lance through her. His hold was far from gentle and the longer he held, the more painful it became to stand.

"You. Will. Be. Mine," He hissed, anger flaring in his eyes as he pulled her closer. "Nothing will stop this, my little dragon, not your friends and not your gods." He lips found hers roughly, teeth clashing and Evelyn was powerless to stop it. His grip and his whole being made her flinch, the taste of burnt copper in her moth as he pushed her back. This action was what caused Evelyn to lose her footing once again. The shadow laughed more as the darkness consumed him and she was left alone. Always alone. Evelyn didn't understand what was happening anymore and the fear was destroying her. The door finally budged and in tumbled Cullen, followed by Dorian. The moment Evelyn saw them both, she broke down into tears. She had tried to be so strong for so long, now it was just too much. Cullen stood in shock, his eyes never moving from her now forming bruises, his leader became nothing more then a scared child. Dorian however, pushed past Cullen, and took the woman into his arms. Shattered glass lay everywhere, some tinged with blood and others tinted black. As the silence returned, it made both men look at each other. How had they let this happen? It wasn't hard to see that something brought harm to their Inquisitor.

Sera watched as Dorian led the dragonborn into the warmer circle by the fire, looks of worry and shame were passed between them all. How had none of them saw the damage behind her eyes? Or worse, the feelings she was burying so deep? Sera had once seen it, and she had forgotten all about it. What friend had she become? Evelyn had always been there for each of them. She had accepted them all without a second thought, believed in them when no one else would. And now, when Evelyn had needed them...they all had failed her.

"What happened?" Cassandra asked finally, as Eveyln fell asleep against Dorian. The wizard frowned more and shook his head lightly. Cullen was watching the woman who he had known for years now and he had known what it was like to be lost like that. 

"We heard a voice, and well...from what we could hear it wasn't good." He added and turned to Cassandra. "It seems that there is a bigger stake to getting back to Thedas, Evelyn has been keeping things from us and while we have been getting comfy she has been fighting an internal battle. Why have we been so foolish?" He snapped at himself and glared at the fire. 

"It's not just you Curly, we all have been getting to comfy here and not noticed the changes in her behaviour." Varric sighed and drank from his cup, "I mean did anyone even notice her get up? Or leave?" He asked and looked around at the small circle. Sad eyes looked down as they admitted to themselves what had really been happening. "Let's all aim to be better, if we can get home then we should do. How many mirrors have we got?" he asked.

"Three, the main one is broken beyond repair." Cullen said with a frown. "Shattered, unless there is a way to fix them?" He added and looked towards Dorian (Who had been studying the mirrors for the past few weeks.

"There might be, as we know that this mirror is connected to Evelyn more then anyone. Perhaps there is a mirror for each of us?" He asked and looked at each of the inner circle. "That means there is still two out there somewhere. Cullen, you and Varric go to the next location...Windhelm is your city. Cassandra, you and Sera take Riften. See if you can get the guild to help you. I will stay with Evelyn and see if I can help her open up." he said and nodded. They all looked at each other and with a nod, got to work. 

\---elsewhere---

"Excuse me?" The voice was a small one, childlike and innocent. The elf turned and saw the little girl, pigtails in her hair and a ragged teddy in her arms. The man frowned slightly and knelt.

"Yes, little one?" he tried to keep his tone as gentle as possible. But he had just been told that the eluvian he had found deep within the rubble of skyhold had been found shattered. He had yet to find the one in the ruins of the temple, perhaps the mirror had been moved? Maybe the mirror was the one that now lay in pieces?

"I had a bad dream..." the little girl sniffled and he understood then that this girl had no idea where she was, or where her family were. He picked her up slowly and held her, maybe one day, him and Evelyn could have a little one like this child?

"Oh? Why don't you tell me?" he asked, watching as she blinked wearily up at him. "An old friend used to always tell me that talking about it helped." he added softly, walking with the child in his arms. Maybe it was a bad idea to turn from his duties, but as of late he found himself more and more thinking on family. Of his lack thereof. 

"I don't know, it was just dark and I couldn't find my mummy." The little girl sniffled again and snuggled deep within the old God's arms. He was about to say something when he noticed her calm and her breathing become calmer. "You smell like home." she yawned. Solas smiled ever so sadly as he sat down, careful not to disturb her. 

"Shhh, little one. Sleep now." he breathed and looked over at the desk before them both. Time was stretching now, how long had it been since he saw his heart? Was he ever going to get her back? His eyes lowered onto the now sleeping form of the child, could he ever have a family? Would Evelyn even want one? The fade was now completely one with the world. The veil he had made had fallen, his goal had happened without him. The demons seemed to have disappeared entirely, without a barrier there was no cause for spirits to become corrupt. The only problem now was that the fade itself was crumbling. Pieces of land were just disappearing. Dwarves had noticed the lack of darkspawn too, the legion of the undead had sent messages stating that all the liars of the old gods were gone. What remained was miles of empty deep roads. 

Solas could only hope that something would happen soon, something that could lead him back to Evelyn and maybe, together they could save Thedas.


	22. Sometimes it's better...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shadow decides to show Evelyn the truth behind The Dread Wolf.

It took five hours for Dorian to heal all of Evelyn's injuries on the outside, yet the mage could not even touch upon the ones upon her heart. His friends was falling apart and Dorian knew little on what they could do for her. Dorian watched as Evelyn curled up and watched the fire before them both. 

"I will be right back, I am just getting some water, then we can talk. Okay?" He asked her, taking her slight nod as agreement. Dorian would not have left her if he knew what was going to happen. As soon as the door shut, the eluvian's they had collected shimmered and glowed. 

"I think it is time I show you the truth, little dragon." the cruel laugh was back, but the man behind it was no where to be found. So Evelyn closed her eyes and tried not to think on the pull from magic. Magic she had once found calming. "Come, see your wolf for what he really is." the laughter taunted, enough for Evelyn to admit defeat and follow. What she was not expecting was the blue spirals that touched the sky or the people who walked by her without so much as a second glance. Evelyn looked back, finding no mirror behind her and no more laughter. 

Walking forward to what seemed like a beautiful garden, fountains and flowers were everywhere, it was so...beautiful. Looking at her reflection, Evelyn was shocked to see her in a lovely red and gold dress, with a gold circlet around her head. No markings or scars, but make up in it's place. She was practically glowing in the daylight. Evelyn looked up and saw similar people with others (marked and dully dressed elves) following them. Where was she?

"Evelyn! Evelyn!" came a call, causing Evelyn to look over at a very excitable young man. "Your father told me to fetch you. Come, come quick! We wouldn't want to keep the gods waiting." the child grinned more. Evelyn felt wrong and sick, but followed slowly. The dress showed off all her curves, and had her back on show. Looking down at her hand, there was no mark what so ever. Where was she? In some twisted dream? And why did she feel so lost?

The boy led her to a stunning building, golden spirals and marble pillars. A family on the terrace that welcomed her with open arms. Evelyn recognised her mother almost instantly, the way her hair fell and smiled. The other two were not, were they the family she never had? The one she lost in war and fire? Questions she could not ask as they were soon joined by three others. One, who looked so much like Flemeth that it scared Evelyn. One who Evelyn had never seen in her life and the last...Evelyn felt her heart twist as the young man before her looked around her home with disinterest. This man was Solas, but so much younger. He had similar fur armour on, but on his head was a wolf's head, tied with feathers and beads that made him look the part of god.

"Welcome, my lady, you recall my wife Atisha? My daughter, Evelyn and my son Talon." the man said proudly. "Shall we begin? I am sure my family can entertain your guests." He added and offered the door to the goddess. Flemeth's eyes, however, burned into Evelyn's. When Evelyn refused to look away, they narrowed slightly and she stepped forward, taking ahold of Evelyn's chin. 

"You are different from last time we met, child. I see fear and pain in your eyes. Why is this?" the tone was that of a strict mother, who worried so much. The man who claimed to be her father blinked in surprise. "With everything you have, why would you hold such emotion at the sight of us?" she added, looking closer into her face.

"Evelyn?" He added, looking worried. Evelyn felt overwhelmed once more. Evelyn found her eyes turn to Solas once again, who was now looking at her intently. The attention off Flemeth was enough to capture his attention.

"I do not know what you wish for me to say." Evelyn replied, while looking at The Dread wolf. "Except that I am not the child you have met." Evelyn pulled out of her grasp, causing the other lesser known being to start spouting terms of disgrace and shame. Flemeth, or Mythal, silenced the being and turned back to Evelyn. 

"Walk with me." The woman said and offered her hand to her, Evelyn slowly took it and followed the woman. Glancing back in time to see that Solas had not took his eyes off her, even though the other male was now huffing at the wolf.

\---

The first part of the walk was quiet, almost serene. Mythal looked down at Evelyn with a slight smile.

"Away from them, we can talk without fear and with honesty. So tell me, child, who are you if not Lady Evelyn?" she asked, her tone no longer strong or firm. Evelyn thought back to her mother and how she would get Evelyn to talk about bad nightmares. Kind words go a long way. 

"Truth be told, I have no idea how I got here. I am Evelyn. But I did not grow up with a family or in Arlathan." Evelyn replied and let go of the woman's arm. "I have not known this...peace. What you have here...I don't feel it, I am not supposed to be here and I worry that if I am here then the spirit of her is there. And I wish that on no one." Evelyn said and turned to the fountain they had come too. 

"And you know Fen'harel how?" Mythal asked as she stood still, taking it all in. Not judging or rolling her eyes. This question made Evelyn laugh sadly, she sat down in front of the cold stone wall. 

"Through accident and toil, he became more to me then a simple wolf. He was Solas. My Vhenan." Evely said and looked up at the sky as Mythal sat beside her. The soft motion of running her hand through Evelyn's hair was enough to send the girl to sleep.

"You are here, for how long I can not say, the realms around us change constantly and you should enjoy this. Be a part of this. Before you return to the dark from which you came. Be with your family and see if my friend recalls your spirit. After all, one's heart never forgets where it belongs." Mythal said softly, "Now sleep, if you must, you might find tomorrow leads to something better." she added softly. Evelyn followed this advice and allowed herself to relax and sleep. Unaware that Mythal knew of an interloper. Solas walked out of the shadows only after he knew Evelyn was asleep, with his hands behind his back.

"Eavesdropping is rude, Fen'Harel." Mythal chided, amused at the man before her.

"Do you believe her story?" Solas asked, looking down at the sleeping form of Evelyn. "it is very far fetched, love is for fools. Why would I even dally with someone like her?" He asked, seemingly insulted over the fact. Though, he had yet to look away.

"Love does not discriminate, it cares not for power or blood, only that two people belong for all time. You may not find her to your liking now, but time changes many things. And it seems something out there wants you to see what you are missing. Dark magic surrounds her heart and mind, it will be best if we take her back to my temple. Objections?" Mythal looked up at her oldest friend. Who was now frowning at Evelyn. This spelled trouble, and yet...the way she had been so honest was almost...no, he had too much to think on now. Slaves needed freeing. 

"No Objections." Solas finished and looked at Mythal finally. "But I am not babysitting." he huffed and turned around, walking away. Mythal laughed faintly, and looked back at the child on her lap. 

"Whoever you are, Evelyn, I hope you find what you are looking for here." she added, seeing the slight spark of green magic and the slight wince on Evelyn's face. This was powerful magic at work and it made Mythal curious and worried for everyone's future.


	23. ...to have loved and lost...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Evelyn comes to terms with what Arlathan really was, she continues to defy all expectations and even catches the attention of a lone wolf.

It was a long night. One that Evelyn didn't want to end. If it ended, then it just proved that everything around her was real and happening. A fate she didn't want for herself anymore then the last few disasters. The only sliver lining to this was that she got to explore the old temples before they were classed as old. Evelyn was currently sat by a window that overlooked the well of sorrows. Of course, it wasn't called that now. It was just the Well of Memories. Glancing back at her new room, Evelyn felt dismayed as slaves went about their duties. The small and quiet voices of a such great city. Standing, Evelyn left the room. It was hard to face the fact that if she had been born in this time, then she would not have been much different from them. Yet, now she was a guest of Mythal. 

The guards watched her carefully, the servants bowed with simple smiles, all these people had no idea their fate and that didn't bother them in the slightest. So why was Evelyn so sad? Why was it so hard to bare? Evelyn sought solace, or peace, or maybe just empty space. So it was only natural she aimed for the gardens. It was like a forest out in the grounds. Trees and flowers, rivers and lakes greeted her and welcomed her. Halla and other animals were roaming nearby, they seemed not bothered by her at all. Evelyn stopped by a pure white Halla, who watched her just as carefully.

"May I join you?" Evelyn asked softly, her voice barely above a whisper. If anyone was watching, then she would be seen as crazy, but what made the moment so much more was when the Halla bowed her head and let Evelyn approach. "Thank you." Evelyn smiled, brushing the soft fur and sitting down in the grass. Her plan for alone time was foiled however, when a light cough brought her back to now. The halla now staring intently at the man before them.

"You are in my spot." Solas said firmly, his eyes never leaving Evelyn's. in fact, they seemed to hold anger and confusion over how she managed to calm the animal to be so close.

"Funny, I thought I was sat outside. And I do not see your name anywhere around here." Evelyn said without thinking, then glanced back at the god. Who seemed surprised at the tone of her words. "You are welcome to share the earth, with me, Solas." Evelyn added and turned from him. Looking out to the flowing fields and plants. He made a noise that sounded much like a huff and sigh, before Evelyn felt the wind shift and his presence beside her. 

"You are too informal." he was blunt and sat about a foot away, clear intentions to stay away but enjoy the nature around them. "Not many know my name, so how is it a woman I have never met says it so knowingly?" he asked, he had those same calculating eyes. Evelyn smiled ever so slightly. How long had it been since he had looked at her that way? As a puzzle that needed to be solved.

"When I say your name, what do you feel?" Evelyn asked, curious herself in this matter. "Since names have power." Evelyn added with a soft sigh. Forgetting about her impending death or the fate of all the worlds she lived in. There was a long stretch of silence. Evelyn looked at Solas fully and found him watching her intently. Like she held something much more then he let one.

"Nothing that words could properly describe. How did you know?" He asked finally, the air around them changed then. Instead of awkwardness and confusion there was something new. Something Evelyn could never mistake as anything other then hope.

"My name is Evelyn, and in my entire life there was only ever one person who could make my name seem...more." she replied and picked a flower, then another, then another. Tying them together in such a intricate way. "I know the feeling of having one's name called or spoken in such a way that makes everything that less scary and that less big. I guessed that because when..." she stopped herself here, how could she say he was the one to make her feel that? It was something that no one could explain.

"Evelyn." He repeated and that feeling came rushing back in a whole new way. Butterflies and warmth. A small smile appeared on her lips as she looked back at him. She was still the enigma he needed to solve, but things were different now. Alone at least. "Lovely name." he added and looked away. Was he embarrassed?

"Yes, Solas, many say that." Evelyn laughed faintly and let the silence stretch between them. Now there was a different reason why Evelyn didn't want the sun to come up. Because whatever spell they were both under now, would defiantly be gone by the morrow. What made Evelyn smile at breakfast a few hours later was how easy it was to talk to the young Solas. How easily he let his emotions out and how open he was about everything. Of course, there were topics he avoided like before, but she found herself noticing how well she could work around them. Years of practice maybe? Without the loss of Mythal and the betrayal of the other gods, Solas seemed so much more himself. 

\--- xxx ---

Time was not always kind, this she knew very well, but it also showed how one coped with tragedy. Solas had not handled it at all, Evelyn wondered if he had yet to process what had happened to everyone he knew. And his blame in all of that. The day was slow, with many meetings and greetings. She remained silent as Mythal showed her Arlathan. The spires and buildings, the towers and murals that had yet to be made. The people and markets, the lack of the veil made magic so beautiful. However, every so often Evelyn would feel the burning in her hand and notice the green sparks appear for a moment. It wouldn't be long before the mark made it's entrance and her time here would end. 

It was a further three days before that happened in it's glory. Evelyn had spent every night with her Solas, learning and teaching the dread wolf all about her old world. Of dragons and magic that burned so many. Of gods that did not talk to their people and of demons that talked too much. Spirits and friends that waited for her. He seemed to get closer and closer, something he had wanted to tell her but didn't. It was while they were in a council meeting. Evelyn was stood by the wall as they talked of politics and events that had happened recently. Including herself. 

"Oh, and about the slaves and servants disappearing. We are close." a woman with bright red hair and fire red markings all over her. She reminded Evelyn of the main huntress in her own clan. Her eyes landed on Solas as she spoke, "Whoever is hiding them shall be punished." The woman added with a glare. Solas only smirked at her and acted indifferent. So it had begun, now it was only a matter of time.

Evelyn watched as the argument went on, different ideas on why the slaves were disappearing and who was taking them. Evelyn winced as a sharp pain ran through her hand and up her arm. She held her arm tightly as she tried not to give herself away. The more she fought, the more painful it got. 

"You just don't care about anything do you!" the woman shouted at Solas, who was now glaring. It was this that finally sparked the magic in the room, a cry from Evelyn and a gasp from everyone as the room filled with green light. Markings danced all around the walls, flashes of images and runes caused more cries from Evelyn. The mark on her hand flared and flourished as green magic bloomed in front of everyone.

"what is that?" Mythal asked slowly and stood, walking towards the centre as the images blended into fractions. Like smashed glass. Worlds that Evelyn had never even seen before. "It looks...ethereal." she said softly and reached out. The moment she touched it the colour exploded and magic seemed to fade completely. Evelyn gasped for air as the pain subsided and the area seemed to quiet down.

"What is this? Trap?" a man in black clothes snapped and stood, looking around in suspicion. But now, the longer it seemed to go on, the more sleepy Evelyn found herself.

"No, I believe our guest's time is up." Mythal sighed and walked to where Evelyn was. "Stop fighting, child. Go now, and do what you have too." she soothed softly as sparks flared around her. 

"What do you mean, leave?" Solas asked, finally looking at Evelyn. He walked over too as silence befell the hall. "You can't leave." He added and knelt in front of Evelyn. 

"I...I have too." Evelyn frowned and flinched as magic pooled between them. "Ar lath ma, Vehnan. " she whispered and leaned forward. She had just managed to brush her lips against his when a strong pull. Evelyn gasped as cold air and the sound of rain met her now. The sudden loss of that world hit harder then she would have liked...but maybe it had all been a dream? Maybe that was all just what she wanted out of life...Maybe that would be enough.

 


	24. ...Than never loved at all.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evelyn faces the bitter truth, and it's a hard pill to swallow.

Evelyn blinked as she looked around, the sound of rain echoed throughout the cave. Dorian had returned, and yet he wasn't worried about her being up and about. She must have not been gone long. He offered her food, which she took out of familiarity. The sense of loss she felt remained like an ugly reminder. Solas had loved her, even in the time before the veil. But the truth that they were more then just lovers only seemed to burn at her heart. The fractured pieces stung like splinters and only one could help heal that. Evelyn glanced up at her dear friend, noting the worried glances, and offered a smile.

"I am fine, Dorian." she breathed, hiding how broken she was inside. Her words did little to settle the looks, but Dorian accepted the words.  
"I worry that we put too much on you, and that if you break then I will lose my friend." Dorian said as he increased the flames. He really was worried about her, and that only made her guilty. How had things fallen so far? How had things got so broken? Evelyn smiled sadly and shook her head,   
"I have you to keep me grounded." she replied and looked up. Maybe she would have been prepared if she told her friends the truth, maybe she would have been able to fight if she wasn't so weak and distracted. Maybe Dorian wouldn't have been so pale as the shadows ripped her from the cave. Maybe, just maybe, she would have been able to get them home if she had been cold and heartless.

\- x - x - x - x -

When the others returned to a cold cave, alarm bells rang in each of them. When Evelyn and Dorian didn't answer it caused worry and chills down their backs. The sight of a hurt Dorian and the absence of Evelyn brought back a sick feeling of dread. The eluvian room was sealed and there was no trace of their fearless leader. When Varric managed to get health potion in Dorian, and helped him to come around, that feeling increased ten fold.

"Shadows, I wasn't sure, but all I could see was shadows." Dorian was in no state to mount a rescue and they were clearly out matched. What they needed was a plan, power and maybe even help. They talked, argued and plotted all night. Getting nowhere fast and each second with her gone meant that they were one step behind the real problem. Stressed, cold and tired they all admitted that they were out of their depth. Without Evelyn, they were too different to work together. Cassandra wanted to track down the inquisitor, along with Cullen. Yet Sera and Varric believed the best option was to find clues as to what this shadow thing was. Dorian was in too much pain to even consider planning their next move. 

It wasn't until murmurs came from the eluvian room that they managed to get the help they needed. It seemed that Solas had finally managed to get the mirrors to work correctly. Did that mean that Thedas was growing smaller or whatever was blocking the path before was gone? All that the group could think was happy thoughts. They finally had some idea what to do. (And Dorian got a bull sized nurse). They explained what had happened for them and asked questions on their home. Each day that had passed in Skyrim, a month had passed in Thedas. Solas remained silent as the two groups finally caught up with each other. It had been so long since they had all been together and yet, that cold emptiness remained. 

"Where is Evelyn?" Solas finally asked, watching the frown mar Cassandra's face. The guilty look on Dorian's face and the quiet that came from others. 

"Gone. She was taken, pulled into the shadows while we were out." Cullen spoke, anger and worry in equal parts. 

"What do you mean she got pulled into shadow?" Solas asked slowly, as he looked around the camp. Looking at the shadows around them.

"We were talking about how fragile she seemed and the entire cave became dark, then shadows, they were like smoke." Dorian winced as he sat up, "They surrounded me and dragged her away. All I could feel was cold and depression. Like a demon had taken over me." he finished. Solas recalled Cole's monologue. Shadow wolves. 

"We have no way to track her. No idea what took her and worse, we have no plan of action." Cullen huffed, obviously distressed of the loss of his leader. Solas ignored the pang of jealously and focused on the mark. His mark. 

"I can find her, what we should expect is something else, but maybe we be prepared for anything." He said slowly, summoning a wisp of green light in front of the inner circle. They would have to be quick, Thedas would not survive if they lingered. 

\- x - x - x - x -

The floor was cold. Bitter and biting. It was that feeling that finally roused Evelyn from the dreamless slumber. The stiffness in her body was a reminder of everything she had been through since everything started. Hell, she looked good for a dead person. Her hands brushed against cobble stones, she wasn't in the cave anymore and that was alarming. Evelyn looked up, her eyes burning in protest, and saw the alters before her. Each alter had candles, idol and offerings. What surprised her wasn't the lack of Skyrim idols but the fact each one was an elvish god or goddess. All except Elgarnan. The all Father.

"Figured it out yet?" Came a snarl, it made Evelyn recoil and come face to face with a very angry Solas. Not Solas, the copy of him. The mimic that had broken her so effortlessly. "Who I really am?" it asked, hands gripping the bars as he looked down on her. Evelyn shook her head, she really had no idea. The creature laughed and stood. It's laugh was empty, hollow and horrible. "I am everything the Dread Wolf should have been. Mythal believed she was so smart, banishing me to void. Yet it just made me stronger and when your petty gods took you back, they freed us all. Now I will bring all those to heel and you, my pet, will help me." he mused and looked at the alters. 

"I will never help you." Evelyn finally found her voice, realising that this being was going to destroy everything she loved because he had been tricked. "I will be your downfall." She added, knowing that her friends would find her eventually. Somehow.

"Oh, Evelyn. You won't have a choice in the matter." The smile he gave her was carnal and evil. Evelyn never felt so alone and lost then she did in that moment. The only hope she had was worlds away and her memories only damaged that hope. WHy couldn't she go back to that dream and stay there? In that world. Evelyn flinched as the cold seeped into her body, like a disease that corrupted everything...like....like...

Evelyn opened her eye's quickly as she noticed the mark was flashing red now, the cobbled stone wasn't actually meant to be. It was covered in crystals that looked eerily similar to Lyrium.  _Red_ lyrium. Her hands were bleeding all over them and the horror settled in. He was truly corrupting her body and soul, she would be lost to herself and nothing would change that. Evelyn looked up at the demon's face and knew her fate was now sealed. If her friends found her, she would no longer be the inquisitor but the leading cause to their deaths. 

"No!" She screamed against the metal bars, "No...." she wasn't strong enough to keep the voices away, she wasn't strong enough to keep fighting and as the time passed, Evelyn wasn't strong enough to keep being herself. She only hoped that her friends would be strong enough to put her down. To finish her off for good this time. Maybe then, she would find some peace.


	25. Choices

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solas has to endure, for all their sakes, otherwise Thedas is doomed.

Varric hated the feeling he got whenever he glanced towards the bald elf. The man before him looked tired and cold, like all this was too much on a single soul. He prayed to the maker for some sort of divine intervention. Some gift that could win whatever battle they were fighting now. This felt different from the last time, maybe because the joyous singing from Evelyn was missing or maybe it was the solemn pace they walked. He felt more like he was going to another funeral then rescuing their beloved leader. Glancing back towards the elf, made everything seem that bit darker. It was bad enough that they were getting used to this new world but knowing that things back home weren't okay made it all hit that much harder. 

They had been relaxing, enjoying the quiet, whilst others had been fighting. Maybe that was why everyone was silent? They were all thinking on how bad things were if Solas was adamant they return. Varric looked back towards the Seeker and Cullen, they both had angry looks. The same anger he could recall from before Skyhold. Evelyn had brought them together and made a family, and now she was missing....or worse. Why did things always have to get worse before they got better? For once, couldn't they have a story without turmoil and death?

"We're close." Solas spoke with such softness that it shocked Varric. The little wisp was fluttering around, almost like it was excited about something. It wasn't until the quiet hum that was so familiar reached his ear that Varric paled. 

"Something's off." He said and stopped the old god, "Listen." he added. Hoping he could hear it too and it wasn't just a side effect of having been near red lyrium for so long. Seeing the confusion turn to horror made it all that much worse. The hum grew louder as they continued down the path. It led the party towards a burrow. One that looked like it had been opened recently. "How is that possible?" Varric muttered as he noted the red, glowing crystals that seemed to seep out of the stone. Last thing he knew about lyrium was that this world didn't have it like Thedas did.

"You said that this world had been plagued with demons from the fade? Whatever brought them, must have brought this too." Iron Bull spoke up, glancing between the elf and Varric. Solas sighed, it seemed the only possible explanation. But why did it feel so much more than that? 

"There is only one way to see, let us move on." Cassandra huffed, drawing her sword from it's scabbard. She pushed open the black doors and entered the crypt. Silence returned on them as they delved deeper into the ruins. All of them edge, all of them expecting the worse, and not a single one seemed to think on Evelyn's well being. After all, if she was in here like the sprite believed, then that meant she had been in contact with the red lyrium. Even if it was only for a moment, that still could have bad effects on a mind. 

Cullen was the first. He opened another door that lead into some sort of throne room. There, he saw her. Evelyn had always been beautiful, but now it only caused a deep sense of loss. She was sat on the throne, legs crossed over and a sword lay across her lap. Her old armor had been discarded and now she wore a dark metal which seemed to hum just like the lyrium. Her helmet looked very dragonesque and her eyes were hidden. The only reason Cullen knew who it was, was her long hair that remained lose beneath the metal helmet. 

"Evelyn?" Cullen asked, causing the others to turn. They all remained a fair distance as she remained still. Cullen went to take a step forward when Solas stopped him, motioning to the rest of the room. Dragurs, skeletons and demons seemed to be bowing towards Evelyn. If they started any of them, then it would be an all out fight. One that Solas was unsure they would win. His eyes scanned the statues, dragons again, and noted the alters of varying items. They seemed familiar for some reason.

"You made it!" came a very deep voice, one that sounded twisted and almost too happy. Gray eyes met with black ones as Solas came face to face with a mirror reflection of himself. "Evelyn was so certain you would come in time." the creature mused and ran it's hand over Evelyn's shoulder. Solas watched as Evelyn finally looked up. Once again, Solas came face to face with a fear he did not want to face. Her once bright eyes were now dull. And not only that, but the blue he had been so used too was now a deep red. A sign of lyrium poisoning for sure. The creature moved ahead of Evelyn and smirked so darkly.

"It's a shame she didn't have any fight left, I expected more from the hero of Thedas. Then again, she didn't come back totally correct to begin with." it was pushing him, egging him to engage or lose his control. What little control Solas had left anyway. But Solas never took his eyes off of his love, his heart, which now lay in the enemies hands. So open to take and yet, he would surely die if he tried. "I can see why they had to bring her back. Her spirit inspires courage and love and all those icky feelings that won even the Dread Wolf." the monster that had it's claw in her now demanded his attention. Solas narrowed his eyes as he took in this shade's true nature. It didn't want Evelyn for her talents or power, it wanted her because she was his world. Vengeance. 

"You have me at a disadvantage." Solas spoke, trying to remain calm as he felt the others shift behind him. The enemies in the room seemed to come alive as he spoke. Even Evelyn seemed to tighten her grip on the sword she held. "You know me, yet I do not know you." But a weird memory called forth into his head. Black wolves at her heels.

"Oh, I am a mistake. A combination of hatred and anger towards you, or at least the old gods that left their people. You did my job for me when you got rid of the others, they all have alters here." It motioned around the room and stepped towards Solas once again. "But how could I outwit the dreaded wolf? The trickster? I couldn't. Yet, you gave me everything I needed to create your downfall." It laughed and turned towards Evelyn and motioned to her. Solas felt his chest constrict as she stood, the armor was tight against her. Revealing most, if not all of her. Fabric trailed down her legs, her eyes never left Solas as she stood next to the thing. "You made it so easy for me to come in and destroy what little she had left. Without you, she was broken and with you, she was lost. So easy to take and control. She will now be your end, and while she is doing it, the demons and others will keep the rest of your party busy. First things first though." It said and turned back to Solas.

"Can't have you using Mythal's power against us now, can we? I'm afraid magic won't work too well in here." He mused and turned back to Evelyn. Solas strained to hear what the being whispered to her, but the look of determination and dealthy intent was clear as he moved away. Solas expected something to happen, maybe she would fight the power that controlled her or maybe the others would stop her from ending him quickly. What he didn't expect was her attacks. She was faster here, stronger and used more then just her sword. Without his magic or Mythal to fall back on, he was stuck in defense. His staff could deter her blows. But she attacked with such ferocity that it shocked him. All those times he saw her fight, never did he see her like this. Complete disregard for the arena. 

The sounds of battle could be heard all around the pair, the demons clawed and the dragur attacked with the same determination as Evelyn. This would be a stalemate if one of them didn't give in. Surrender could be so easy, yet something made him carry on. Blow for blow, he didn't let her pass. It would kill her to know she was his death, but it would be fitting end to their story. He caused her death, so surely she should be his. As this thought settled into his head, he noticed a change in her. A glimmer. 

Maybe it was just a futile hope or maybe it was more then what he saw. Her sword managed to evade his staff and stop just next to his neck. Solas gasped as he felt cold steel against his skin. Her eyes, red and full of anger, settled on his. 

"What are you waiting for?" The shade was back, stood not to far from them, his calm demeanor breaking. Solas dared not speak, something was going on inside her head that made this action stop. "Finish this, Dragon." the demon spat, stepping closer to her. It was quick once again, the moment that was so close to death to watching the shade gasp and gurgle on it's own blood. Evelyn and spun, full swing and drew the tip of her sword across it. Solas could see the black blood seep through the robes. 

"You made a mistake, demon. Trapping her only gave room for me." It was her voice, yet not. Anger and fury tinted her tone and the way she stood was different. She seemed to be something else. Something....new. It gasped and fell onto his knees. "May you find peace." She spoke again and finished the shade before turning her now tinted blade back onto Solas. Her eyes remained red, holding his in a deadlock. 

"Evelyn...." Solas said slowly, unsure who he was talking too. This whole thing was too crazy for him to even follow anymore. Her eyes seemed to only hold more anger at the mention of her name. 

"You." She started and narrowed her eyes, "Should not be here." she finished and lowered her blade finally. The others finally finished dealing with the enemies as they reached the stairs. Varric, Cassandra and the others all watched as the two stood a foot apart, her blade dripping with demonic ichor and his staff dented and chipped. For some reason, things didn't seem peaceful or calm. They all looked between Solas and Evelyn, the hate she held the old god was almost too much to witness. Varric had once thought it might be easier for Evelyn to hate Solas, but this...this just felt wrong. 


	26. The dragon behind the girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solas comes to term with Evelyn's new persona, though he finds it hard to be within the same room as her. Things take a turn for the better and things seem to finally turn around.

Silence had fallen around them. The old god watching his heart glare at him. No love or kindness within her eyes, nothing that called out to him, it cut deeper then he would ever care to admit. Solas had watched Evelyn for a very long time, and even though this person looked like her, it simply wasn't. 

Her shoulders which were once soft and fluid were now tight and squared. Her hands, which once caused a wild storm to calm, were now turning white with how hard she was holding her sword. Her smile and eyes that once sparkled were now replaced with a scowl and sharp stares. He was stood before a complete opposite of his heart and he had no idea how to talk to her. 

"Sparky?" Varric was the first to break the silence, and he could hear the slight worry in the dwarfs voice. "You okay?" he added, not making any sudden movements. It seemed that Solas wasnt the only one to notice the change in her demeanor. Evelyn finally looked away from Solas and directly at Varric, he didnt shy away from the glance but Solas note the others take a few steps back.

"Yes, Varric." she replied, her voice strained against the words she spoke. "As fine as I can be considering the situation." she added coldly. Solas had never heard her be cold before. Even after everything, Evelyn had always been forgiving. The woman before him looked at each one of her friends, her eyes scanning the room. 

"Okay...good..." Varric replied, not entirely sure of himself at the moment. Not that Solas blamed him. 

"We should head back to the cave you made into a camp." Solas spoke finally, his voice stronger then he felt. Her glares was back on him and it felt like it wasnt about to fade any time soon. Agreeing, they all smiled out of the room until only he and Evelyn remained. "I..." Solas had wanted to apologise, to make her see that being apart had killed him inside, but the words died in his throat. 

"Whatever you are going to say, Wolf. Save it." her tone was unnatually brutal and harsh. Being called wolf made it all the more painful. "What happened was beyond either of our control and making a blubbering display of affection would be wasted." she huffed and finally moved away. Each step hurt him. She stopped at the bottom.of the steps, turning to face him once again, her eyes a little less angry. "You cannot fix this." she added, her tone seemed...dejected. And with that she had gone.

Solas was left on his own for the moment. And it felt longer then all the time he had been away from her. Evelyn was his heart and right now, his chest felt empty and scarred. What had he expected? A loving embrace? Her lips on his? It didnt fit and knowing that he got here too late to save that was beyond heart breaking. He sighed and followed suit, staying at least a few feet behind the group.

Her demeanor and attitude did not dissuade the others from jumping right back into the usual inner circle chatter. She remained silent and observing though, very much like an outsider would. What had the shadow done to her? He recalled what she had said and it did not settle the worry in his chest. What was trapping his love? And why should he not be there? Whatever this was. It made everything that much worse.

Unbeknowest to most of the party, Evelyn was not free yet. Not that anyone knew the depravity of the situation. The woman they had all come to cherish was currently locked in a battle with her self. Dragon, inquisitor, friend and lover. All were her, yet all were currently seperate. Her eyes bored the brunt of the problem. Many believed the mark made Evelyn unchanged by Lyrium. After all, she had come in contact with it more times then anyone. Yet it never changed her. Now it seemed like Lyrium was her prison and one no one could help her escape from. 

Her eyes returned to the centerpiece of all this. The man who her heart had claimed. Humans and elves didnt mate for life, Dragons however, Did. And it just made her even more angry that this being, this supposed god of tricks and war had won her so easily and hurt her so badly. Although the feelings of care and love were overflowing for the elf, all that Evelyn (at least the one in control now) could think of was how he had left her, broken her, lost her and killed her. Everything that he should be sworn not to do. The confusing mix was doing nothing to settle her and if anything, made her even more angry at the fact she had so little control.

Were they doomed to face this? Or would he allow her to ignore it completely? The way he looked at her, hurt. The way his eyes begged for something she did not know how to give made her anger fall. He did not ask for this and had come for her anyway. While the dragonborn watched the wolf, she noticed the paleness of his skin, the fresh scars and bruises that he tried to hide. She notice how he must of lost weight or the armour he was wearing was a size too big. He seemed...hollow. Was that her doing? This thought started a snow ball effect that made the dragon halt in her tracks. The others barely noticed as once again wolf and dragon were looking at each other.

"Yes, Evelyn?" he asked, using her name instead of the usual endearment he had given her. This made her brow furrow as she watched him. When she did not reply he frowned again, looking tired and older then he should have been. This made her eyes narrow as she reached up and brush her fingers over the ceases by his eye.

"You are older then I remember." her voice was wary but familiar. The actual made him recoil, like her touch was painful to him. Her hand dropped and a slight frown marred her lips. "You must eat more." she stated, hiding the hurt behind the usual glare. Solas was alarmed at how quickly her attitude changed. What was he dealing with? 

"I...Evelyn..." he started, not sure how to continue on this conversation. He felt like they were walking on ice and any moment he could fall through and drown.

"I understand that she...I...never full explained what I am." she sighed and looked towards their friends once again. "It was eaiser to pretend then face it. Heart of an elf, soul and blood of a dragon. It sounds less complicated when you consider it. But the truth is that many parts come together to make a whole." she said and once again glared at him. Though, he now noted that it was calmer and less threatening then before.

"We should catch up..." he interrupted, wanting to avoid all of this for now. She was not having any of it however as she grabbed ahold of his arm.

"I am not sure what that shade did. Nor am I sure how to undo it." she said firmly, eyes blazing like an inferno. "but know that a dragon protects her loved ones, even if she does not recall the why." she huffed and stormed passed him. Leaving him, once again. In surprise. Did she just tell him that she loved him still? Or was he missing half a conversation? Whatever it was, Solas felt a little less lonely then he had done before. 

Back at camp, the tension did not ebb away like the others had hoped. Evelyn remained elusive and standoffish. Which made Cassandra worry about her friend. Solas avoided being anywhere near her and spent allot of time with the cracked eluvian. Varric was the only one openly trying to get Evelyn involved. She seemed to tolerate the dwarf more so then the others. Bull found that she was conflicted, battling a inner war that was not going to be clean to walk away from. They couldnt do anything for her, So he told the others to give her time and Space. None knew what she went though and none expected her to say just yet.

\-- Xx later that night xX --

Evelyn had shed the armour and burned it. Much to everyones surprise. She then disappeared for an hour or two. When she returned, her eyes were less red and more purple. Her demeanor was calmed and she even began to smile again. Her old self beginning to shine through as she finally gave hugs and spoke. 

It wasnt until Sera mentioned Solas that the atmosphere dropped. Evelyn smiled weakly and nodded. As Sera put it, she need to face that last demon before they headed home. So, Evelyn, who was beginning to feel like herself again. Decided to face the wolf who remained apart.

She watched him for a time. Seeing him look broken as he worked. He never let anyone see what was going on inside and even now, it felt like she shouldnt be there. The wisps of anger and rage were still present and the need to make him see her grew with time. 

It took twenty minutes for her to finally get the courage to announce herself and even then, she watched him slip behind that mask once more.

"Yes, Evelyn?" he asked, the tone he used was empty and made her flinch. She could recall how she had treated him but that still didnt soften the blow.

"We need to talk." she said, she knew it wasnt going to be fun and was a long time coming. He hummed in response, not looking up from the mirror. "I..." she started wanting to explain how easy it had been to give up due to being apart for so long. She had wanted to hi and cry and scream at him for not saving her sooner. But the truth was, it all came down to how little she had been able to control herself. How her only true weakness was him. It would always be him.

Her silence made him look up, he stood just a few inches in front. She could smell the earth and fire that always followed him. He looked at her, his eyes boring into hers. She was lost again, forgetting why she was there to begin with. In the moment she knew what she had to do and she fought the urge as long as she could. He surprised her though, clothing the distance without speaking a word.

Everything stopped when his lips met hers. All the pain. The sadness. The anger. Even the nightmarish memories. His arms made her feel safe and his tastes brought her home.

Whatever it took, she would never leave his side again.


	27. The wolf behind the man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solas and Evelyn have a second, much needed, heart to heart.

The kiss had left them both wanting and breathless, however, she found herself cold as he stepped back. Apologising for his action and the fact he couldn't save her sooner. And though, she might be different to what he recalled, he still loved her with every ounce of his being.

"Solas." Evelyn said with a slight tilt of her hear, her eyes dancing with an emotion that Solas did not know. "Stop blaming yourself for something you had no control over, okay? Allot of things play a factor in this and your tardiness is not one of them..." she mused and walked to the broken Eluvian. It reminded her of them. Once powerful and together, but now in pieces. How long would it take them to piece what they once had back together? 

The whole room seemed chilled with their conversation and somehow, Evelyn found herself thinking back to when all this started. How shy and naive she had once been. Totally in love with her people's lore and the idea that the world was so much bigger than that. Looking into her shattered reflection made her frown slightly. "When we first met, this wasn't what I had foreseen would happen between us Solas..." she added, glancing at him in the reflection. His gaze was that of tiredness and hopelessness. Had he given up too?

"Nor did I. I was so set in my ways that you were not something I had planned for." He said and brushed his fingers over her shoulder. "What a life, not foreseeing that love could derail me." he sighed and let his hand drop. Evelyn turned quickly and took his hands into hers. Warmth bloomed between her fingers as she looked into his eyes once more. Loneliness and pain were his constant companions. She had given him reprieves in his long life, but that was all.

"We keep missing each other and not realising that it would be so much easier not to fight it." Evelyn said with a frown. "I am afraid Solas, of myself and what I can do. I am afraid of letting you in again just to lose you." she admitted, opening the flood gates that held so much back. In fear of scaring him away. All that she had wanted to speak about when he was leaving her. "I am terrified of falling in love, of having connections and roots that can be used against me. But more than that I am tired. Tired of being alone and having the world on my back." she breathed out. "I just want to be with you, for now and until the end. But it seems that the world has other plans for us." she said and put their foreheads together. He remained silent as she carried on. 

It was like giving him foresight into her head and what exactly was causing her to be so irrational and chaotic. Solas did not know what to do with it. He was brilliant with lore, excellent with spells and talented in the fade. Yet when it came to her and his feelings, it was like all words died in his throat. A lump formed there as she tumbled on and on. Losing herself within her words. He once again stopped her tirade with something he only did with her, a kiss that lasted a mere moment. 

"Did anyone ever tell you, you talk too much?" he whispered against her lips, feeling her breathless laugh against his. "I love you, Evelyn." he sighed faintly, letting himself be led by that complete overwhelming emotion that he once was so afraid of. She was so strong and he knew that if they were to get through this than he would have to be too. She had just found another side to herself and here he was moping over the fact she acted so coldly. She probably didn't recall that nor what she had said, if she was here, trying to make it better.

"mmm, maybe." she replied, her hands brushing his faintly. This moment lasted longer than any others. It wasnt until Cassandra came looking for them that they even knew that time had passed. And once again they all had to figure out the most important question.

"What next?" Cullen asked as he watched Evelyn, she shrugged and held her knees. "How do we get back?" Cullen added. 

"If we knew that Curly, we wouldn't be in this mess." Varric mused and ate the bow of stew that Sera and Cass had made for everyone. "Than again, could we go the way we came?" this question was directed at Solas.

"No, the Eluvian is beyond repair. We need divine intervention if we are to go home." Solas said simply, playing with his own bowl of stew. Evelyn flinched at the word divine and focused on the others. Hoping no one saw her reaction. 

"What is it Sparky?" Varric asked. Evelyn frowned and looked at the not-so-dwarfish-dwarf. 

"We can make a deal with a deadra lord but...it's similar to a demon." Evelyn muttered, the silence was deafening.

"No." "Not on your life." "You going crazy?" 

the chorus of dismissals made Evelyn smile faintly, before she turned to Solas who had yet to reply. 

"I do not know what they would want, but it's probably our only chance." She added, hoping the wolf would agree. He simply frowned, his eyes searching hers.

"You have dealt with them before." His tone was not a question, and that made her wince again.

"Yes..." she said slowly, hearing the same chorus of anger from her friends. "Before I met you lot." she added to the group.

"You won't do it alone." Solas added before standing. "the longer we are away, the worse it will get." he added slowly.

 

\---- Later ----

 

The cave was now lit up with candles, the group were stood at the far side and Evelyn was sat in the middle. Her eyes closed and her breath even. Solas was interested in what she was doing, but he was not expecting the big blob of blackness and eyes to appear between him and his heart.

" _If it isn't my Champion. You have been awfully silent, dragon._ " The entity mused, it's tone laughing and yet serious.

"I know, Mora. I have been...disposed." Evelyn stood, brushing the dust of her pants. "I need your assistance." she added simply, her tone was too similar from before.

" _And what is in it for me?_ " he asked, the tentacles brushing against her skin in an almost loving way. Solas felt his hands clench and his teeth grind as this being played with her hair.

"What do you want?" she added carefully, her eyes trying not to betray her worry.

" _For what you ask, my dear champion, the price would be high. I require a new champion no? One of your friends should suffice._ " he mused and Evelyn visibly flinched. " _I need to know of this....other world. They will make a nice addition. Who will you choose?_ " he asked, obviously enjoying her discomfort. Evelyn opened her mouth, to reply, but someone beat her too it.

"I Will." Cullen stepped forward, his gaze steeled and his body straight. Mora turned and all his eyes looked at the Templar. 

" _Perfect._ " Mora mused and looked back to Evelyn. " _We have a deal, Dragonborn, say your goodbye and have fun._ " The deadra lord dissipated as quickly as he came.

"Cullen! What the actual..." Evelyn stormed to her friend, who simply smiled.

"I have a new chance here, a new start and I have ties here that I cannot leave behind." he added and brushed her cheek lightly. Startling the dragonborn. "I have always cared for you Evelyn, and now it's finally time to let you go." he added and kissed her forehead. Evelyn felt her heart tighten as she began to disappear before him. 

One by one they said goodbye, and one by one they disappeared. Leaving Cullen alone in the cave. He breathed out and walked out of the cave. A new life waited for him. On his return to Solitude, a woman with blood red hair almost tackled him to the ground.

"Oh, I thought I would never see you again." she said softly, looking up at the curly blonde hair and smiling face. "You have been gone forever, and without so much as a goodbye!" she huffed, full of life and happy to see him.

"I know, I am sorry Saffron. Come, lets go home." he added, taking her under his arm and towards the homes closest to the Jarl's palace. Thinking back, Cullen would probably not have gone through the eluvain, even if it wasn't broken. His time here, had changed him, and although he would miss his family. It was about time to make his own. And for Cullen, he lived the rest of his days happily within Solitude's walls.

**Author's Note:**

> SO! MY FIRST FANFIC ON HERE *sweats a little* I have been holding onto this for far too long....enjoy?  
> I will be posting most of what I have written up, but because of Nano next month, the rest might be delayed! Anyway, leave any comments on what you think. Newbie writer ftw <3


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